Eugene Mirman

Eugene Mirman is one of the disciples of the best comedy club in Boston -- The Comedy Studio. Escaping relatively unwarped from Rick Jenkins' mesmeric power, he's had a nice career, written some truly inspired stand-up (best "Ladies, tell me if this is true" line ever) and also been way ahead of the curve with his web presence. You may remember him from a few months ago, when he taped his conversation with a Christian Long Distance Service who patiently explained how Verizon was pimping kiddie porn.

Eugene's currently banging out a bunch of short films on said site -- eugenemirman.com -- including the one pictured here. In Scotch and Soda, Eugene passes on the finer points of addiction to the next generation of human wreckage over a fiiiiinnne beverage.

Go take a look, and also remember, if you go to the Comedy Studio and say you know me, Rick Jenkins will give you the best seat in the house. But beware, he will also lie. Do not believe any of his filthy tales. What happens in the Bangor Maine comedy condo STAYS in the Bangor Maine comedy condo, you bastard ...

All links via the highly addictive Screenhead.

Stop t3h Gay!

As a follow-up to the column referenced in this post, Dr. Dobson now has advice on how to keep your son from going gay. Seriously, somebody hacked the site. I WISH I'd written this as parody. Brad Plumer has the good link, via our earnest young friend and fine writer Ezra Klein.

Bankrupt me!

Now, I promise, this won't become hectoring -- I'm only going to remind you about our Charity of the Month at the first, 15th, and end of the month.

But it occured to me -- although donations are coming in at a decent pace for the Army Emergency Relief Fund, I worry that by linking your donations to your perceived value of my writing, I'm missing money from the people who come here and hate me.

So, a quick addition -- I will personally MATCH whatever you people donate to families of soldiers in need. You think I'm a talentless hack? Write the bigger check, and suck me dry of my ill-gotten gains!

Now back to your regularly scheduled snark. And don't think about how, in the richest nation on earth, families of soldiers risking their lives and dying thousands of miles from home have to scramble to pay their mortgages or buy food for their kids. You know, just zone out. As if you're on vacation. On your ranch.

Presidential Vacation Watch - Day 9

Bush Vacation Day: 9
American Soldiers Killed While Kickin' It in Crawford*: 37

Bush Days on Vacation Remaining: 25
Avg. American Vacation Days Remaining*: 4




*(yes, I know he gets phone calls and signs documents. You know what? I get phone calls and sign things too. It's not gruelling.)

*(based on 13 avg. days of vacation, courtesy World Tourism Organization)

Single Shot

Here's a spiffy idea, particularly in a city as spread out as LA -- Single Shot is a free daily e-mail, each consisting of one (1) funky place, cool current happening or interesting diversion base din Los Angeles. If you're in LA and don't want to wade through the endless reviews in the dailies (and then lose the damn thing when you're trying to remember what you read), you'll find this pretty useful.

I subscribe, and it's already given me a couple new bars and restaraunts to check out, along with updates on what's currently at the local art museums.

Single Shot ONLINE Magazine and E-mail

Linkslut

Hey, just a heads up -- got some minor personal business coming up, so light blogging for the next week, mostly link-slutting around to keep a toe in.

Why I Dig the Future

From the always interesting female-gamer columnist Alice in Wonderland -- the story of a virtual clothing designer. Follow the link to the video. Apparently this is part of a much larger documentary, one I'm really looking forward to.

Crucial Family Advice

... in these troubling times from Giblets at FAFBLOG!

My favorite part of the article "Is My Child Becoming a Homosexual?", from the ever-thrilling Dr. James Dobson (no link because, well, I don't link to trash):

"Evidences of gender confusion or doubt in boys ages 5 to 11 may include:

1. A strong feeling that they are “different” from other boys ..."

If there's a more efficient, telling summary of the worldview of this dying tribe of hateful idiots, I can't imagine what it is.

Kia ora

... to our massive influx of new readers from New Zealand thanks to Public Address. And I only know how to say that thanks to one of our Spec-monkeys, Hadyn at Grabthar's Hammer. When I'm running my post-apocalyptic compound up in Canada, I look forward to a brisk trade in canned goods and fresh fruit, all by solar sail-ship, with our New Zealand brethren

Donations

No, good Lord, I'd never have the temerity to hit you folk up for money for myself. (Somewhere, my manager and agent just winced) But we're kicking up enough traffic here, we should harness this little swarm for some good.

From now on, I'll be blogging for a cause. It'll rotate once a month -- there will be representative graphics up once I figure out how to do that, but for now just a listing. The PayPal button goes to a new account made for this purpose. At the end of the month, everything in the kitty goes to the listed charity, and we flip.

I promised Phil Carter, creator of the great blog Intel Dump and who's currently heading to Iraq with the 101st, that we'd start with some of the military support sites he links to. You can read about the Army Emergency Relief Fund and what it does here. At a time when those who say they "support the troops" while sending them to war improperly armored and then short-changing their care when they return, we need to step up here.

We'll be flipping between the Red Cross/refugee relief organizations and troop-support sites for the first few months. There is, after all, a war on.

So, seeing as screenwriting forums & college programs are apparently passing this blog around like the Hot Coffee Mod at a middle school ... and a couple thousand folk a day find my writing of some small value ... I'd like to see a single buck a month if you find anything useful or amusing here. Not even per item. But if you find yourself swinginging by on even a weekly basis, or one of the Links to the right brings you somewhere interesting -- donate. That alone will raise a whackload of cash for very deserving people taking it in the neck for no good reason.

Kung Fu Monkey: transforming hot air and bullshit into a tiny bit of good, one post at a time.

Swearingen For President

I've already put him up for Senate, but ... just go read it.

Index-Fu for August

Bloody hell, another shout-out from a guy far more talented than I. When do I get my first inside-the-Beltway think-tank invitation? Because I am SO going to get liquored up and kick Doug Feith in the crotch. Consider it a promise.

A quick index for all you new, angry readers. I was down and out on a script deadline for the summer, there's few enough posts to peruse for the entirety of June-August -- you may find something amusing in the nooks and crannies of the non-indexed articles.

The two columns Mr. Wolcott sent you here for:

The President and Intelligent Design,

and puncturing, with actual data, the latest conservative bitching-point about Hollywood's liberal entertainment agenda:

I WISH Hollywood Was That Organized.


New Media Writing (Rage against the Studio Machines, Baby):

4th Generation Media

Writing:

Writing Life
Writing: Beginning
Writing: Whose Viewpoint?
Eternity Has Residuals
Writing: Adaptation (Pt.1)
Writing: Adaptation (Pt. 2)
Writing: Adaptation (Pt. 3)
TV: Corner Gas
Writing: Adaptation (Pt.4)
Writing: Software
Writing: Adaptation (Pt. 5)
Writing: Plot and Story
Writing: How Small a World?
Writing: Q&A #1
Writing: Q&A #1 Followup
Writing: You Don't Need Pg. 11

Our attempt at screenwriting academia:
TV Jargon Preservation (Pt.1)
TV Jargon Preservation (Pt. 2)
TV Jargon Preservation (Pt. 3)
TV Jargon Preservation (Pt. 4)

Global Frequency

It's a "Global" Frequency Now
Miranda is ... annoyed
One Last GF Question
GF wow
GF Reviews and E-mails
GF Update #1

The True Geek Conversations(tm)

#3892: Batman vs. Punisher
#651: Catwoman Edition
# 5643: Ju-On, Red State Version
#36679: In Which Bo & Luke Duke Kick a New York Jewish Election Worker to Death
#36679 cont'd: Sophie Mae's Choice
#436: I Love Lucy -- Issue Zero! The Origin Issue!

Politics:

The Latest Rants:

The President and Intelligent Design
I WISH Hollywood Was That Organized
57% of Americans are Traitors
I'm All Out of Reasonable
'ellllooooo Clinton!

The Rest:

Who's Your Daddy, Broward County?
I Miss Republicans (nominated for a Koufax, spiffy!)
Spongiform Sexuality
Win Kamchatka, Win the World
Oh. Oh, Canada.
Gay Marriage
Activist Judges
Will of the People - (the inter-racial marriage/gay marriage polling stats)
I will Punch Florida in the Goddam Neck
SPOILERS! -- the Interview with God
Swearingen for Senate
You Can Know Jesus ...
Learn to Say Ain't - (for some reason, immensely popular and quoted in some serious political websites and magazine essays. Huh. Fooled 'em.)
Senate Quicksand
Learn to Say Ain't - Feedback & Criticism
That Ironic Smell
"Toxic Spiritual Nature" ...
The Groom Grinds a 360!

Comics and Geekery

Fandamentalism
The famous "Geek Hierarchy" Chart
Moral Advantage: Gamer
Comics: Year of the Bummer
Comics: Womb Crazy!
Wold Newton Universe
Zombie News/ ZOMBIE TALES
Comics: Sweet Four-Color Vengeance
SPOILERS -- the Interview with God
Zombie Tales #1 - Everybody Digs Zombies!

The semi-famous LOST: You Uncurious Motherf*ckers

... and, just because it was always my favorite:

Top 10 John Wayne Titles That Could Also Be Porn Titles.

Thanks for visiting. And leave with the assurance that anything you find interesting or amusing -- that was an accident.