Wednesday, January 19, 2005

TGC #36679 - In which Bo and Luke kick a New York Jewish elections worker to death ...

Tyrone: ... no, I'm not going to the new Dukes of Hazard movie. I hated the show as a kid.
John: What, just because their car had a huge symbol of southern oppression on the roof?
Tyrone: Yeah, something like that. Also the sneaking suspicion, that if the show were really about what life was like in the South in the '80's, you KNOW Uncle Jessie had some of the lynching postcards in that shack of his.
John: "... just some good ol' boys ... never meaning no harm ... burning down black chuuuurches ..." -- and we never saw how they got their money to keep that car so cherry either.
Tyrone: That's why Daisy was always in those tiny, uncomfortable cut-offs. They were pimping her out at the local Greyhound bus stop.
John: "Stop crying Daisy, you know we're short on our payment to Boss Hogg this week."
Tyrone: If the Narrator were honest, just once: "Hoo-wee, looks like them Duke boys done blown up their crystal meth lab and are in a heap o'trouble..."
John: Wouldn't that be great? If Roscoe P. Coltrane was really the hero, just trying to protect Hazard County from those two white-trash meth-head psycopaths who kept blowing shit up with their dynamite arrows?
Tyrone: If that were the movie, I'd go see THAT.

25 comments:

Andy said...

Possum on a gum bush, if this ain't the most irritatin' postin' I've read in a coon's age! As a fellow University of Georgia alum, and someone whose mother once dated Sonny Shroyer, I find your comments about them Duke boys downright offensive! Even more offensive is the fact that Shroyer's spin-off series, "Enos," lasted twice as long as my own...>sigh<

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Cops who see dead people: BAD

"Dukes of Hazzard" remake starring Jessica Simpson as the cut-offs clad Daisy Duke... PRICELESS

Curtin said...

They did make a version of that movie. It's called Walking Tall (the Joe Don Baker one, not the Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson one). Although I never did know what "Making their way, the only way they know how/That's just a little bit more than the law would allow" part of the theme meant. Leave it to a Coyle grad to figure it out. Thanks!

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-Devin.

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