Sunday, July 23, 2006

Bar Talk

The brutal, sleepless heat stirs me toward an anecdote, and although I've yet to figure out an underlying point to this ...

I've said I wouldn't dicuss the current MidEast Mess, but some context is in order.
You will not find a more ardent supporter of Israel than myself. I am not sure how bombing the Lebanese Army will strengthen it enough to finally take on Hisbollah, or somehow pushing Lebanon into a failed state will suddenly embolden a government that would then be non-functioning into dealing with the Hisbollah Militia -- I'm sure there's some cunning strategy afoot I can't discern. I don't know how killing Lebanese Christians or Canadian tourists will swing the battle, but hey, I'm no general. If this was some circuitous route by which to finally motivate the mandated disarming of Hisbollah by the UN, I'd suggest there may have been other ways to initiate it.

All I know is that this began with two soldiers kidnapped and is ending with Israeli and Lebanese -- and to be fair a helluva a lot more Lebanese -- children laying dead and broken in ditches. There is plenty of room in hell for everybody in this.

And don't think I'm not very, continually, worried about this.

The anecdote ... it was stirred by the latest from famous lawyer Alan Dershowitz, in which he argues that there is a scale of innocence, and anyone but the infirm and elderly who has not fled forthwith from Israel's assualt on Lebanon is some sort of Hisbollah collaborator. Not may be. IS.

To wit, we must never, ever question the appropriateness of scale or choice in Israel's various responses as odds are, on the Dershowitz scale, a whole lotta Lebanese has a little Hisbollah in him.

"Those who voluntarily remain behind have become complicit. Some [emphasis mine]— those who cannot leave on their own — should be counted among the innocent victims."

I may note that evacuating to God knows where to live on God knows what while apparently any moving convoy is a legit airstrike target may seem to anyone not as ferocioulsy fearless as Dershowitz to be a bit daunting. Noting that people should be fleeing north is a little Kafka-esque while the north is being bombed.

I wish I had some example of how even in one of the most technically advanced western democracies in the world that tens of thousand of people picking up and fleeing, even with advanced notice, can become a massive clusterfuck, with thousands of innocents left in the wake. But hey, he's the perfessor. I'm plainly not qualified to match my own intellectual prowess or moral sense against an internationally famous lawyer who teaches at Harvard.

I am qualified to comment as his bartender, however. When I was a stand-up, I bartended to make ends meet. I love bartending, possibly more than I love stand-up and writing. In my family's eyes it is not just an honest trade, it is an actively virtuous one. A son who ran a pub was just as prized as one who'd become a priest.

I tended in a few cities, but the longest stint was in Boston 15 years ago, during the First Gulf War. The Charles Hotel, four stars all the way, had a little plaza behind it. There I worked at an Italian cafe/restaurant called Giannino's. Our proximity to the hotel and Harvard, specifically the Kennedy Foreign Affairs School, gave us an interesting clientele.

Ken Howard was a regular, a very sweet guy. "Give me a screwdriver, but make it two shots of vodka, and hold the orange juice." I served Ted Kennedy a few times. One guy who came in for a stretch was a writer named David, who asked very serious questions about stand-up. We'd chatted about characterization, tone, performance for a few afternoons before he finally decided to use his credit card to pay -- and I saw the name "Mamet" flash by. We had professors, businessmen, visiting dignitaries, some faculty would eat there on occasion -- Dershowitz, to be precise. Although I'd be hard-pressed to tell you exactly how many times he visited, I can only convey that he made an impression. He was, in bartender short-hand, how would we say ... an asshole.

But not the biggest asshole we ever served. No, that honor belonged to the Saudi prince who stayed at the Charles Hotel during the War. (Wouldn't want to go home and risk mussing the hair, not until the Christian Soldiers had Marched Onward and tackled the dirty work. Natch) The Prince -- I have no idea where he fell on the lineage tree, but that's what he called himself -- only visited our restaurant the once.

Giannino's owner was a young guy named Paul. Paul was a tough, wiry bastard from Holland who'd come to New York, flat broke at 16, to learn the restaurant business. He spoke with a weird, hybrid Dutch/Brooklyn accent. The sort of New York accent an actor puts on when doing a cab driver from the 30's. But on Paul it fit. He was also, as are many immigrants, fiercely patriotic when it came to the US. Zeal of the converted, etc.

So one night we get word that the Prince will be visiting our place. Paul was understandably excited -- the restaurant business is all about buzz. On the night of nights, submachine-gun toting private security gave the grounds a once-over. This was less distressing than you'd think; they'd been lurking around in the parking garage and stairwells for weeks. We'd gotten pretty used to them. The Prince arrived, was seated out on the patio. I didn't see him eat, as my bar was tucked away out of line-of-sight.

Paul pulled out all the stops. Our chef was amazing to begin with, and they put on a hell of a banquet for the event. Paul called in our best waitress, Kate, to do the dinner. If you've ever worked in the restaurant/bar business, you know that the staff is a roiling blend of high school drama class emotions and Desperate Housewives style intrigue. If you've worked the business, you also know that there is always that one person everyone actually likes. Sweet, sincere, working their way through college ... that was Kate on our staff. Even the heroin-addicted commie waitress liked her.

Near the end of the meal, I heard a buzz from the wait-station. Kate was in a corner, pretending not to be freaking out. Paul came out from the kitchen. The Prince had been playing grab-ass with Kate all night. The other servers had seen it. She'd tried not to make a big deal of it, but when it became plain that she wasn't into Captain Handsy, our visiting dignitary had launched into a particularly nasty set of comments.

A bunch of us followed Paul out as he crossed onto the patio. He nodded to the Saudi. "Yeah. I gotta ask you to leave."

Objections arose. Paul shook his head. "She works for me. I don't allow that for any guest. Now I gotta ask you a second time, please leave. Meal's on the house."

The Saudi's lackey starts to yell: "You can't talk to him like this! This man is Prince --"

Paul cuts him off with a whistle, a New York cab whistle. Sets his shoulders and says:

"This is America, which makes you the Prince of absolutely fucking nobody."

The single most patriotic moment of my life.


*******************************************


At the risk of taking the shine off a fine bar story, I think I've finally figured out why I'm dwelling on this. That someone could make the argument that the last, the very last standard in war that we hold in these broken times -- that any and all civilian casualties are to be universally condemned -- that someone could lawyer away that last vestige of human sacredness without puking on himself with disgust frankly stuns me.

Mr. Dershowitz, I don't care that you're famous, or you teach at Harvard, or you write books, and I'm just a hack, the literary equivalent of a workman bartender. This is America, which makes you the prince of absolutely fucking nobody.

This is your bartender telling you -- get the hell out of public discourse. We don't need a new batch of finely crafted amorality: we have enough naturally occuring filth to drown in as it is.










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117 comments:

Noah Brand said...

Thank you; that's what I've been trying to say since I saw that Dershowitz piece.

It's sad how war contains nothing original, isn't it? Every generation or so, same old bullshit from a new quarter.

I just grew up believing that America was better, that Americans would never spout that bullshit because of our principles and, y'know, stuff. I guess I'm really pissed off that I was lied to and I believed it.

Morbo said...

Nice blog post. Sadly, no! linked to it.

Great summation:That someone could make the argument that the last, the very last standard in war that we hold in these broken times -- that any and all civilian casualties are to be universally condemned -- that someone could lawyer away that last vestige of human sacredness without puking on himself with disgust frankly stuns me.
That nicely sums up my feelings about Dershowitz' agitprop crap essay. You want to condemn Hezbollahs tactics, specifically blending in with civilians, fine, most people do. But to call almost every victim a "Hezbollah collaborator" is pathetic and jingoistic logic, and I'm sure Dershowitz knows this.
Morbo

The Imitation Monkey said...

Top post, fellow monkey. If I were employed and solvent I'd contribute. But I'm neither, so I can't. Sorry.

The Fifth Dentist said...

Great article. Though I've never met him in person, I concluded a long time ago that Alan Dershowitz is a tool. He's consistently on the wrong side of everything (Klaus von Bulow, O.J.) while his legal opinions tend toward complete crap. Consequetnly, this latest thing doesn't surprise me at all.

nolo said...

Excellent post. I have tears in my eyes. But please, please don't call what Alan Dershowitz is doing "lawyering." It's an affront to lawyers in general, especially those who are fighting very hard to protect what they can of the rights of those who are getting stuck with the short end of the mentality Dershowitz is spouting.

Brian said...

Bra-vo, sir! Well said.

Joshua James said...

Great frigging post, John, just great, as one ex-bartender (though I did it in Iowa, where it was mainly draft beers and jack and cokes) to another, I thought it kicked ass -

Dershwitz deserves the visine treatment, you know what I mean?

I've been lobbing comments at Sheldon Drobney on huffpost, who has the same position of the Dersh - cannot comprehend how bombing women and children in lebonon is going to fix things over there. Madness.

The Minstrel Boy said...

Let's Hear It For The Monkey!
In my career as a musician I count my time as a bartender, in San Francisco at the Schooner Saloon and Chandlery, Columbus and Lombard, as one of the few stints of honest employment. Our clientele ranged from Longshoremen (their hall was a scant half block away) to lost tourists. God bless Peter the owner. My owner was named Dave and he was a retired NFL lineman, a great guy who had a wonderful knack of diffusing situations by merely occuping that huge amount of space. Dershowitz is off base on this one, like he has been many times. I will take the testimony of a fellow mixologist on his being an asshole customer. Bravo. Again.

Mr Furious said...

Shorter Alan Dershowitz:

"Kill 'em all and let God sort 'em out."

--

"those who cannot leave on their own — should be counted among the innocent victims." Christ, Dershowitz is one step short of "the only good injun is a dead injun."

Tremendous post.

And I love the Prince story. a great tale, vividly retold—I can practically picture it in my imagination to the point of casting it.

1031 said...

and I'm just a hack, the literary equivalent of a workman bartender.

Don't sell yourself short, John. I think maybe the world could use a few more workman bartenders like youself.

Nice post. Keep it up.

nash said...

Brah. Fucking. VO. Re. both the Prince and Dershowitz.

--nashtbrutusandshort
Categorical Aperitif

Kay said...

I'm greatful to Sadly, No for sending me over. I should visit more often.

Speaking as someone who bartended 10 years, off and on, and owned a restaurant for 5.... a standing ovation with many bravos for Paul and for your post.

Simp said...

Apologies in advance for the longish comment. A slight restaurant rant as I miss the business at times....with a great anecdote to boot... feel free to delete if you'd like.

What a fantastic post. This is how I've been feeling about the ME and md damned tired of anyone being remotely critical of Israel being proclaimed as a traitor or anti-semite. The situation is obscene.

Another lifetime ago, I worked in nice restaurants waiting tables (moved on to the tech industry and now a stay-at-home dad). As bizarre as it may seem... I really miss my days of waiting tables. Sure there was tons of bs to deal with daily. The internal politiking of getting certain stations/customers. The drug addicts, dealers, slackers, crazy ass russian immigrants (what a mischievous bunch they were) all the while trying to navigate the dread waters of the Maitre'D's , Chef and Sous Chef egos. Then there are the customers. The ones that think you are bottom dwellers, the carp of the human race, there to simply carry their water.

Aside from all that, you do get 2 classes of customers that really make the restaurant business fun as hell. First are the professional diners. Not the poseurs, but the ones that dine usually on Wednesday/Thursday nights and understand what good service is and how that can make or break the night. Second are the occasional diners that are unassuming and interested in experiencing new things that they are not familiar with and allow you to really guide them through a fantastic dinner.

Anyway, one particularly slow night (after the batshit crazy Christmas season) we had few tables. One 4 top was a businessman obviously entertaining 3 foreign business associates. He was overtly doing everything he could to impress them. Most of it we just laughed off, but every freaking time he wanted something (even the team anticipated was enroute) he would hold his hand high in the air and snap his fingers twice. We tolerated for a bit, thinking it would pass. Nope. I finally told my busser: "Enough of this shit, if he does it again I'm going to speak with him." The busser begged me not to as it was a slow night and they were the only table spending any money. Just then I heard, from behind me, 2 snaps of the fingers. I just gave the busser a look and walked over to the table and bent down and whispered in the host's ear. Then go the order for some drinks and went back to the station.


The busser says: "What did you say to him?"
"It doesn't matter. He won' be snapping anymore. Let's just get these guys out of here."

So the dinner wound down and they left. The host nodded at us as he left and we cleaned up the table and found that he had left a 25% gratuity. Even I was a bit shocked. The busser then emphatically asks "What the hell did you say to him?"

I told him I recognized the type of personality and people like that just want to feel like they are in control. I wanted to gently let him know, that he really wasn't, but also didn't want to embarrass him in front of his guests. So I had leaned down and whispered to him: "Sir, do that again and I'm going to break your fucking fingers."

It really is a noble profession.

Alex Epstein said...

I take your point.

But the Lebanese do have a responsibility to get out of the way. They have chosen, however unhappily and reluctantly, to live with murderers.

Let us suppose that some murderers live next door to you. They hate you and tell anyone who will listen that they would like to kill you and your family. The last time the police came by was in 1983 under Ronald Reagan, and the murderers blew up their police station, so they don't come by any more.

The murderers shoot at your house every day. Sometimes they just smash your windows. Sometimes they maim your pets. One day, they shoot your two year old daughter dead.

The police won't come. Many of the neighbors say what nice people the murderers are, and say they wish they could kill your family too. In fact, they tried to, in 1948, 1956, 1967, and 1973.

In fact, to be absolutely fair, the source of the murderers' rage (aside from their fanatical hatred of your religion) is that they used to live in the same house with you. It's a house that was in your family for generations, and then in theirs, but for centuries it was owned by a Turkish landlord, who rented to both of you, and then a British one. When the British landlord abandoned the house (it was a money losing property), they gave you half the house and gave the murderers' family the other half. As soon as they were gone, the neighbors, along with the murderers, tried to kill you and your family, but instead, you killed some of them and drove most of them and their family out. That's why they took over the house next door.

Fortunately, you can call in air strikes.

Unfortunately, the murderers aren't alone in the house. The previous tenants never left. In fact, they've been asking the murderers to leave, politely, for the past thirty-five years.

You have talked to the murderers' cousins many times about living in peace. Several times (for example, in 1976, 1991, 1993 and 2000) the cousins almost agreed that you could live in the house if you gave back the garage and the shed. But when you gave back the shed recently, the murderers just used it to shoot at you.

Tell me, what you would do, after you came home from burying your daughter?

a. Tell the previous tenants to get out, because you're going to level the house to stop the murderers from killing any more of your children?

b. Go into the house personally, guns blazing, hoping you don't hit any of the previous tenants, who are now hostages -- and hoping you don't get killed yourself?

c. Do nothing, and wait for the murderers to kill another one of your children?

What would you do?

NY Expat said...

I agree that Dershowitz's comments are disgusting, but this sentiment:

You want to condemn Hezbollahs tactics, specifically blending in with civilians, fine, most people do.

I rarely hear expressed, and that's key, IMHO.

I also feel that Israel has expanded the scope of this attack far too broadly, but even if they only bombed Southern Lebanon, where the missles that Hezbollah launch can reach Israel, there would still be civilians dying because Hezbollah intentionally bases itself and its weapons within densely populated areas.

I listened to two interviews today from Fresh Air's archives:

Jeffrey Goldberg who has extensively interviewed Hezbollah in Lebanon.

Julia Choucair, who is from Lebanon and works at the Carnegie Endowment for International Peace.

Neither interviewee disputed the fact that Hezbollah intentionally bases itself within civillian populations.

If what Dershowitz has said is disgusting (and it is), Hezbollah's actions are monstrous. In a just world, protests would be staged day after day condemning Hezbollah essentially writing the death warrant of so many women and children. I won't hold my breath.

Also, this piece of news deserves broad dissemination:

Israel's been planning this for a while, which makes hitting airports and civilian trucks all the worse. However, I don't see a problem with some form of planning for an attack on Hezbollah's rocket positions; there was only one purpose for Hezbollah to acquire 10,000 rockets, and it wasn't defense.

sandman said...

noah brand said:

I just grew up believing that America was better, that Americans would never spout that bullshit because of our principles and, y'know, stuff. I guess I'm really pissed off that I was lied to and I believed it.

The fact that people still point that out leads me to believe that such sentiment and principle is not yet dead. At least, not in the hearts of ordinary citizens.

Never mind that conniving claque of evil fucks running this country into the ground, and all their mouthbreathing hardwired-for-Big-Brother enablers.

Alan Dershowitz is not an American, as you or I might define one. He is not even human.

Brando said...

Really good post. Glad I came over from Sadly, No, I'll have to read more often.

It is extremely sad that the veneer of American civility has been stripped away so casually since 9/11. Not that we were ever the most peaceful people, but I never thought we'd stoop to the level of practically rooting for civilian casualties.

Peggy Archer said...

A very fine bar story indeed!

Thanks for the giggle!

Anonymous said...

To Dersowitz from http://www.couragevow.com:
I vow to call a coward anyone who tries to hide their fear with false bravado or with unprincipled acts of violence, including attacks on civilians, kidnappings, cruel and unusual punishments, or torture.

salvage said...

This is America, which makes you the prince of absolutely fucking nobody.

I want that on a shirt.

Doodle Bean said...

Bravo! A virtuoso piece!

And thank you!

Anonymous said...

http://hotzone.yahoo.com/b/hotzone/blogs7803

Some analysts have theorized that with attacks against civilians and non-military installations, Israel is trying to turn the Lebanese population against Hezbollah by making them pay a price as Hezbollah's host nation.

--

There's logic for you. Dont attack your enemy. Attack their neighbor. And then the neighbor will become your friend. Or as sun tzu said, the neighbor of my enemy is my friend, which is why I must bomb him into submission, and make him attack my enemy for me.

Stefan Jones said...

Would it be unkind to wish that that Saudi prince's son might some day have the character-building experience of waiting tables at Giannino's?

Rogers said...

Alex, that's a false choice. There is a full spectrum of response besides those three choices, and you've specifically avoided mentioning that even when the people leave, you're calling air strikes on the driveway as they try to get out.

That sort of simplicity seems to boil down the issue, but it obfuscates the options available.

Not to mention the fact that "Fortunately, you can call in air strikes" kind of very casually tosses away a major part of the discussion -- Israel is by far the only legitimate superpower in the region, and as the only nuclear power -- not to mention being unconditionally backed by the US -- it is no way shape or form in real danger of being "pushed into the sea." I believe Israel always has the right and responsibility to respond to terrorist attacks. But there is a spectrum of possible response, and I'm sorry I don't see either the moral clarity in mass reprisals or the strategic value in doing so.

Oh, and Juan Cole is over at his site explaining why Hixbollah is guilty of war crimes. And for such a famous anti-semite, he's being pretty clear on the subect. Point is, this isnt either/or. Hizbollah is monstrous. And so we should excuse monstrous behaviour on our part why?

A little empathy also wouldn't hurt. By these standards, the Brits would have been completely justified in bombing the shit out of civilian populations in Ireland in the 60's and 70's. I don't think we would have let that slide.

The sad thing is, I am and awlays was in full favor of a massive NATO-based peacekeepig force working that border. Too bad our troops are stuck somewhere else ...

Rogers said...

Specifically, Alex, I refute d.) Kill the neighbors until out of frustration they turn on the murderers in their own house. I am not down with that.

carla said...

I've never been a bartender, a stand up comic, a lawyer or met Alan Dershowitz.

But this is the best damn post I've read in a long time.

Brilliant. Fucking brilliant.

Gag Halfrunt said...

Oh, and Juan Cole is over at his site explaining why Hixbollah is guilty of war crimes. And for such a famous anti-semite, he's being pretty clear on the subect.

I hope that "famous anti-semite" is just a fecetious reference to people who accuse Juan Cole of anti-semitism because he criticises the Israeli government. I read his blog regularly and I've never come across anything to make me think that he's anti-semitic. And if he was, he wouldn't be pointing out that Hizbollah is guilty of war crimes. He also wouldn't point out, as he has done in recent posts, that Israel's actions would count as legitmate self-defence under international law if they confined their attacks to genuine military targets. Furthermore, he wouldn't have argued against boycotting Israeli academics and universities.

KMTBerry said...

I, too, had thought that we had ALREADY (DUH!) learned that war is HELL, and next time somebody throws one, not to go.
I am STUNNED that ANY AMERICANS are still buying this Bullshit, and I am glad, sincerely glad, to know that there are others out there who also thought that we are "over" the whole "war" thing.
Maybe most of us ARE !! Now let's get to beheading the Bush Administration for Treason, of which they are guilty on at least five to ten counts.

Xanthippas said...

That was great man. Heartfelt, sincere, and right on. Thanks for sharing it.

Steve Hayes said...

Cool stories, but for the factoid that this started with the capture of two Israeli soldiers by Hizbollah.

MediaBloodhound said...

A perfect anecdote to expose the indecency and inhumanity behind Dershowitz's comment and the man himself. Thank you. But I guess we shouldn't expect anything less from a guy who has championed the use of torture.

Incidentally, if Dershowitz had grown up a Saudi prince, why do I get the feeling he'd be just as much of an asshole as that grabby Saudi. And maybe that's another test of how we treat fellow human beings - whatever our state in life, whatever our national allegiance, it's how we act when innocent people are under siege, when they are being wronged, whether by lone louts or bullies or government-sponsored indiscriminate airstrikes.

These are the tests of our collective humanity. Sadly, collectively, we are failing.

Sickofitall said...

Seems like when dealing with the Dershowitz and fellow travelers the bottom line is that Israel and the USA can do no wrong. Everything else follows from this assumption.

The notion that the kidnapping of two soldiers justifies the mass murder of innocent civilians is incredible.

Sounds like the sort of thinking that was much discredited when coming from sources other than USA and Israel. But, since we can do no wrong then there is no problem.

Innocents killed by USA or Israel = collateral Damage. To be ignored.

Innocents killed by anyone else = victims of terrorism. To be wept over.

That Girl said...

Thanks, great post!

Sporty said...

Absolutely false equivalence and absolutely wrong choices, Alex, as others have pointed out.

In a situation where murderers are terrorizing a neighborhood, the police negotiate in order to reduce bloodshed. If that doesn't work, they call in greater forces (ie. a SWAT team) and the SWAT team negotiates. Overwhelming force is the last resort. If you live in a civilized country it is, anyway.

And those non-murderers living in the house who have been doing what they can to not get killed? Those would be called 'victims', Alex, not perpetrators.

Kaethe said...

Fabulous post. I came via Pharyngula, and it was worth the trip.

MarkusB said...

I said this elsewhere, but WRT the inner tale, Kudos to Paul for putting his employee above “buzz”. I suspect there are those who would happily feed their help to the wolves for a little bling ca-ching.

Kudos also to you, John, for an all-around brilliant and moving post.

Kevin Wolf said...

Damn good stuff.

Sent over by Sadly, No!

NoVA Liberal said...

Isn't the specifically targeting and inflicting harm on the civilian population (ala Sherman's March), you know, a war crime?

Great post, as usual.

Kiri said...

sickofitall: not just to be wept over, but to be revenged by all-out war. This entire situation is ludicrous. The kidnappings merely provided an excuse for Israel to start bombing the shit out of Hesbollah (and Lebanon, seeing as how they seem to be somewhat geographically inseperable) and vice versa.

A pox on all their houses, I'm sick of the madness.

Platypus said...

Brilliant. I came here via a link to your chickenhawks post via a comment on Glenn Greenwald's, and I thought that was pretty good, but this is even better. We don't need to put up with the aristocratic elitism of the Saudi Prince, the intellectual elitism of dorks like Dershowitz, or the moral elitism of the entire fucking right wing. They can all go stuff themselves.

Desert Son said...

"This is America, which makes you the Prince of absolutely fucking nobody."

Awesome!

Which is why I continue to remain baffled that a certain portion of the population (according to some polls, it appears to be hovering around 30%) seem to want to replace the republic with a monarchy.

How fucked up is that? This is the United States of America! We were very specifically founded on the idea of NO KINGS!

I wish the royalists would take King George with them and hie off to someplace like Saudi Arabia. There's yer monarchy!

Sorry abou the rant. I'm down to outrage and numbness. That's what I've got this week. Maybe next week, more upbeat, dramatic renewal of purpose. This week, I'm holding on like a gila monster and that's all I can do.

Rob

bellatrys said...

Pissing on the Marquis' carriage wheel is all very well, but at the end of the day the Marquis still owns the country and can send you off to war to die for him. --As Prince Whoosis and his pals, our untitled but very real princes of the oil baronies, are doing to poor restauranteurs' kids and waitstaff's spouses this very hour.

So while it might make you feel better about yourself, as an extension of a national self-identity with a romantic inflated notion of individual power, it doesn't really matter in the big picture.

Greg L. said...

Hello Mr Rogers,

Let me add my voice to the chorus... great story.

Something that hasn't been mentioned in the MSM: Israel was the aggressor initally. As reported in Turkish papers, Israel kidnapped a Palestinian doctor and his brother, on the grounds that they were either collaborators or part of Hamas. In response, Hamas commandos kidnapped an Israeli soldier, which triggered the events now unfolding.

I am not an antisemite. However, no state, including the USA, has a right to target civilians in this manner. The excuse that Hezbollah is among them...Hezbollah wasn't in the ambulances that were targeted; nor were they in the convoys of fleeing cars that were attacked; the UN post that was destroyed, killing four observers were not Hezbollah, (But they were observing the carnage, and so...)

No, Dershowitz's flailing sematics aside, Israel is wrong here.

As an American, I have a right under my constitution to call bullshit.

Callin' it.


A letter from Chomsky and others on the recent events in the Middle East (July 19, 2006):

The latest chapter of the conflict between Israel and Palestine began when Israeli forces abducted two civilians, a doctor and his brother, from Gaza. An incident scarcely reported anywhere, except in the Turkish press. The following day the Palestinians took an Israeli soldier prisoner - and proposed a negotiated exchange against prisoners taken by the Israelis - there are approximately 10,000 in Israeli jails.


That this "kidnapping" was considered an outrage, whereas the illegal military occupation of the West Bank and the systematic appropriation of its natural resources - most particularly that of water - by the Israeli Defence (!) Forces is considered a regrettable but realistic fact of life, is typical of the double standards repeatedly employed by the West in face of what has befallen the Palestinians, on the land alloted to them by international agreements, during the last seventy years.


Today outrage follows outrage; makeshift missiles cross sophisticated ones. The latter usually find their target situated where the disinherited and crowded poor live, waiting for what was once called Justice. Both categories of missile rip bodies apart horribly - who but field commanders can forget this for a moment?


Each provocation and counter-provocation is contested and preached over. But the subsequent arguments, accusations and vows, all serve as a distraction in order to divert world attention from a long-term military, economic and geographic practice whose political aim is nothing less than the liquidation of the Palestinian nation.


This has to be said loud and clear for the practice, only half declared and often covert, is advancing fast these days, and, in our opinion, it must be unceasingly and eternally recognised for what it is and resisted.



Tariq Ali
John Berger
Noam Chomsky
Eduardo Galeano
Naomi Klein
Harold Pinter
Arundhati Roy
Jose Saramago
Giuliana Sgrena
Howard Zinn


- posted by Pablo @ 1:25 PM

Anonymous said...

Bombings Hit Children Hardest
By Dahr Jamail
Inter Press Service

Monday 24 July 2006

Beirut - About 55 percent of all casualties at the Beirut Government University Hospital are children of 15 years of age or less, hospital records show.

"This is worse than during the Lebanese civil war," Bilal Masri, assistant director of the hospital, one of Beirut's largest, told IPS Monday.

Not only are most of the patients children, but many of the injured have been brought in serious condition, he said. "Now we have a 30 percent fatality rate here in Beirut. That means that 30 percent of everyone hit by Israeli bombs are dying. It is a catastrophe."

The fatality rate was high, he said, "because the Israelis are using new kinds of bombs which can enter shelters. They are bombing the bomb shelters which are full of refugees."

Masri told IPS that he believed so many children were becoming casualties because of the "widespread and indiscriminate nature of the bombings" and because "children are least able to run away when the bombings commence."

Anonymous said...

The best discription of read of the situation can be summed up as follows:
Indiscriminate aerial bombing to rescue two captured soldiers, that's like blowing up a guys apartment building because he swiped your bike.

ginmar said...

I love you, and I love no one. Wonderful post.

Ross said...

Not for nothing, but following up a post that criticizes Dershowitz's extremism with that letter from Chomsky is exploitive. Simply the language in the first paragraph (emphasis added):

"when Israeli forces ABDUCTED two civilians....the Palestinians TOOK an Israeli soldier PRISONER"

Doesn't take an expert at language to see he is, just like Dershowitz, letting his preconceptions justify his arguments.

Same can be said for "indiscriminate bombing vs. two captured soldiers." I guess all those rockets falling on Haifa were just pretend.

My poing is that I read John's original post as a call for reason. Personally I would like to see EVERY third party doing everything they can to stop the bombing now and sort 'em out later, and I've been once again extremely let down by my own government in this situation.

But in terms of constitutional rights, if you're gonna be against downplaying the losses and responsibilities of one side, you should be against it for both sides.

Callin' it back.

Leftist Lady said...

So, I wonder what in what sort of things Pr-oh-fess-ur Dershowitz is complicit?

Great post, Monkey. I like!

--Leftist Lady--

Anonymous said...

hey, it may interest you to know that Paul, that wiry bastard from Holland, officially became an American citizen this year. He's alive & kicking people out of his restaurant when the need arises, regardless of their royal or celebrity status. John, you were clearly before my time at Giannino's, but I have known Paul almost 15 years, and I can definitely hear the prince of absolutely fucking nobody coming out of his mouth, god bless him... The F word still flows freely in the kitchen. We'll be sure to keep an eye out for Dershowitz & send some of your energy his way.

servant said...

This is exactly why we keep you on the payroll, Sir.

You're the one that everyone likes.

Bill Hooker said...

So while it might make you feel better about yourself, as an extension of a national self-identity with a romantic inflated notion of individual power, it doesn't really matter in the big picture.

I respectfully disagree. I'm about to apply to become a US citizen, and I needed that. I am grateful to be reminded of the reasons I chose to come here despite a government I loathe. Every day I am flooded with shameful displays like Dershowitz'; it's positively a relief to hear a story from "my side".

As for individuals making no difference in the big picture -- well, you go ahead and give up. I'll keep trying for now, thanks very.

Greg L. said...

Ross said:

Not for nothing, but following up a post that criticizes Dershowitz's extremism with that letter from Chomsky is exploitive. Simply the language in the first paragraph (emphasis added):

"when Israeli forces ABDUCTED two civilians....the Palestinians TOOK an Israeli soldier PRISONER"


I disagree. When you consider that Israeli FORCES (Emphasis mine.) abducted two CIVILIANS... Palestinian SOLDIERS took an Israeli SOLDIER prisoner.

The use of 'abducted' in this context is justified.


As for:

'Same can be said for "indiscriminate bombing vs. two captured soldiers." I guess all those rockets falling on Haifa were just pretend.'

Just as I could never equate the suffering of the innocents in Lebanon, with the suffering in Haifa; the inequality of the damage in Israel caused by the Hezbollah rockets, and that in Lebanon caused by Israeli/US smart bombs, cluster bombs, helicopter strafing, and now bunker buster bombs targeting same...is manifest.

Idan Cohen said...

I approve of this post like whoa, I must admit!

Ross said...

Greg,
I don't want to abuse John's comments section by hijacking the conversation (perhaps we should already move to email), but just quickly

-On the first point, I disagree about the context since the people in question were accused of being participants in Hamas's military activity (making them equal to Israeli soldiers in the argument).

-On the larger, it is difficult to justify Israel's response, especially in light of yesterday. Some blame Israel for attacking the positions that hurt Hizbollah, others blame Hizbollah for selecting civilian areas to position themselves. Still, I believe there is a difference between what Israel has attempted (poorly) to accomplish and Hizbollah just launching rockets into a city to see who dies.

I think most everyone (at least those reading this) wants the fighting to end, and I'm sure you're among them. However, I still feel that Chomsky's arguement was just as callous and single-sided as Dershowitz's, and that was the focus of my response.
Ross

Sue said...

When I was doing night-school film school in NYC years ago, there was a woman in my cinematography class from the then-fledgling CourtTV (sorry for all the hyphens in that sentence!). She said Dershowitz was calling her constantly, demanding they give him a show. She kept telling him they weren't interested.. I'd already worked with Dershowitz once on a documentary, and all I could say was, "He probably thinks that's against the natural order."

Greg L. said...

Hello Ross,

Well, I don't think Mr. Rogers minds some back and forth discussions between his visitors. (As long as the Snark is absent...or at least, well mannered. :)) Some of the Artful Writer commentaries spring to mind; oscar nominated writers, writing passionately...sear your eyeballs.

- Unfortunately, it has yet to be determined whether the Palestinian brothers were members of Hamas. Accusations are not facts. Israel hasn't revealed any evidence, other than the unfounded accusation. I hope that we can agree that capturing foreign citizens, in their own country, is wrong; regardless if it is done by Israel, or the U.S.

Soldiers abducting civilians, is different than soldiers capturing other soldiers.

- My problem with Israel's ham-handed invasion, is that it showed absolutely no regard for those in Lebanon NOT affilated with Hezbollah.

In trying to cut out the Hezbollah cancer from Lebanon, by using Shock and Awe tactics, Israel has instead caused it to metastasize throughout the Middle East; severely damaging both its and the US standing with the Arab street.

So, yes, I would want Israel to comply with the ceasefire; and, I would want Israel to join with the Kuwait teams in trying to get control of the massive oil slick spreading in the Mediterranean....

But, I think it's going to get much, much worse.

I disagree with you about Chomski's letter. In my opinion, he and the other signers of the letter, hit the right note.

We can, however, agree to disagree.


Greg L.

Anonymous said...

I was inspired to make this into an
icon, which I plan to use.

Sal said...

The Prince of absolutely fucking nobody - genius.

You express things so much better than I could ever hope to, not being a politician but just wishing they would take more notice of us, on your side of the pond and on mine.

Wcw said...

Great story, great rant. Thanks.

As for the commenter who most deserves hate mail, I have sent it to him off-thread.

almostinfamous said...

i think this goes well with your post, John

van.mojo said...

we are not worthy! we are not worthy!

Our Monkey's Kung Fu is not strong!

You know, all the other whinging about "big pictures" aside, that was just a great bit of personal political talk... thanks!

mojo sends

Steve said...

"This is America [...]

This is your bartender telling you -- get the hell out of public discourse."

Pegs the irony meter.

This is America, where everyone can get in on public discourse. No damned barkeep is going to tell me otherwise.

Get a clue.

kona said...

Howdy. I was just doing a search for Ristorante Giannino's in Cambridge when I came across your post. I worked there as a waitress for a year back in 1998-99 and I am in the middle of writing a short story about one of my experiences.
I just want to thank you for telling that anecdote about Paul. You described him perfectly! "A tough, wiry bastard from Holland" with a "weird, hybrid Dutch/Brooklyn accent." So freakin' true. He was such an amazing character to work for.. -Always swearing up a storm in the kitchen. I've never been so verbally abused in my life but I love him just the same. Anyway, that's all. Just wanted to say thanks for sharing. Maybe I'll send you a copy of my Ristorante Giannino's story when it's finished..
Rock on.
-kona

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said...

人材派遣
派遣
派遣会社
チューリッヒ
自動車 保険 見積
高知 不動産
徳島 不動産
盲導犬
国際協力
出会い
出会い系
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出会いサイト
不動産
広島 不動産
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成長ホルモン
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said...

徳島 不動産
結婚相談所 横浜
高松 不動産
高知 不動産
ソニー損保
お見合いパーティー
広島 不動産
岡山 不動産

dance said...

医院開業
行政書士
アクサ
アクサダイレクト 有料老人ホーム
三井ダイレクト 現金化
クレジットカード 現金化
ドロップシッピング
為替
看護
ウェディング
結婚式
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沖縄旅行
外国為替
引越
副業
賃貸
不動産
出会い系
人材派遣
派遣会社
ショッピング枠 現金化
クレジットカード 現金化
FX
東京 土地
パイプカット
ローン
アルバイト 求人情報

dance said...

医院開業
行政書士
アクサ
アクサダイレクト 有料老人ホーム
三井ダイレクト 現金化
クレジットカード 現金化
ドロップシッピング
為替
看護
ウェディング
結婚式
ウェディング
結婚式
沖縄旅行
外国為替
引越
副業
賃貸
不動産
出会い系
人材派遣
派遣会社
ショッピング枠 現金化
クレジットカード 現金化
FX
東京 土地
パイプカット
ローン
アルバイト 求人情報

dance said...

手形割引
ペアリング
インプラント
美容整形
債務整理
ショッピング枠 現金化
ショッピング枠 現金化
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FX
出会い系
格安国内航空券
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人材派遣
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Anonymous said...

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dance said...

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威龍
人妻 風俗
熟女
勃起薬
精力剤
勃起 不全
インポ
精力剤

dance said...

すすきの
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デリバリーヘルス
横浜デリヘル
横浜デリヘル
品川デリヘル
すすきの 風俗
包茎手術
デリヘル

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said...

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said...

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ゼネラリ
チューリッヒ
不動産

dance said...

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dance said...

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dance said...

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dance said...

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dance said...

横浜デリヘル横浜横浜デリヘルのホームページへようこそ。横浜、川崎、藤沢、横須賀、鎌倉、逗子、大和へ横浜デリヘル致します。当店は無店舗型風俗店(出張風俗・デリヘル横浜デリヘル風俗)です横浜デリヘル横浜横浜デリヘルのホームページへようこそ。横浜、川崎、藤沢、横須賀、鎌倉、逗子、大和へ横浜デリヘル致します。当店は無店舗型風俗店(出張風俗・デリヘル横浜デリヘル風俗)です

dance said...

<すすきの 風俗風俗情報満載!エッチ動画やエッチ画像見放題。すすきののソープランド, すすきの 風俗ヘルス,メンズエステ,キャバクラ,札幌のすすきの 風俗のデリバリーヘルスを3000人のフードルプロフで紹介<すすきの 風俗風俗情報満載!エッチ動画やエッチ画像見放題。すすきののソープランド, すすきの 風俗ヘルス,メンズエステ,キャバクラ,札幌のすすきの 風俗のデリバリーヘルスを3000人のフードルプロフで紹介

dance said...

男性下着 のことならプロパガンダ。他にも男性下着 、ビキニ、男性下着 、トランクスからセクシー系まで男性下着 のことならお任せください。"男性下着 のことならプロパガンダ。他にも男性下着 、ビキニ、男性下着 、トランクスからセクシー系まで男性下着 のことならお任せください。"

dance said...

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勃起 不全
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品川デリヘル
すすきの 風俗
デリヘル
男性下着
吉原 ソープ
威龍
精力剤
インポ
すすきの
デリヘル
人妻 風俗
精力剤
勃起薬

said...

不動産
派遣
クレジットカード 現金化
インプラント
データ復旧
コンタクトレンズ
キャッシング
不動産
投資
FX
アフィリエイト
toefl
パソコン自作

said...

美容整形
外国為替
現金化
外国為替
派遣会社
クレジットカード 現金化

said...

派遣情報サイトには、魅力的なお仕事をたくさん掲載しています。派遣お仕事をお探しの皆さまにとって、より使いやすく便利なサイトにするべく、アデコ派遣情報サイトをリニューアルしました。

said...

美容整形することによって絶対的な美を得られるわけではありません。美容整形『自分は変わった』という事実を物理的に確認することで、気になって仕方がなかった自分 の体に対するコンプレックスから解放される。美容整形そこではじめて心を研ぎ澄まし、自分の内面を磨いていくことができるようになるのです。そうして人は美しく なっていく。美容整形外見だけ

said...

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شركة مكافحة الحشرات بالرياض
شركة تنظيف منازل بالدمام
شركات تنظيف بالدمام
شركة تنظيف فلل بالرياض
تنظيف فلل
افضل شركة تنظيف فلل بالرياض
شركة تنظيف شقق بالرياض
شركة عزل اسطح بالرياض
شركة نقل اثاث بالرياض
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eng sara said...

افضل شركة تسليك مجارى
تنظيف بيارات بالرياض
كشف تسربات بالرياض
افضل شركه كشف تسربات
اصلاح تسربات
عزل خزانات بالرياض
افضل شركة عزل اسطح بالرياض
تنظيف خزانات
شركه عزل مائي
احسن شركات العزل الحراري
شركة كشف تسربات بالرياض
جهاز كشف التسرب بالرياض
حل ارتفاع فاتورة المياه
كشف تسرب المياه الكترونيا
تخزين اثاث
تهريب الحمامات والمطابخ

Obat Kutil Kemaluan Ampuh di Apotik said...

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Pengobatan Untuk Kutil Kelamin atau Kemaluan said...

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Pengobatan Kutil Kemaluan Untuk Pria said...

This was a fantastic article. Really loved reading your we blog post. The information was very informative and helpful...

eng sara said...

شركة تنظيف خزانات بالرياض
عزل مائي
شركة تخزين عفش بالرياض
شركة تنظيف اثاث بالرياض
شحن عفش داخل السعودية
شركات نقل وتغليف اثاث
شركة تنظيف واجهات زجاج بالرياض
شركة تنظيف بيوت شعر بالرياض
شركة ترميمات بالرياض
شركة رش مبيدات بالرياض

obat kutil Kelamin No 1 said...

Salam Kenal Aja Gan

obat kutil Kelamin No 1 said...

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salep kutil kelamin said...

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Obat Sipilis said...

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