I'm sure you've seen, the movie theater industry is now about to show live sports in order to staunch the bleeding. Theater attendance down 9% ... what to do, what to do ... how, they wail, how do we get people to go back to the movie theaters? Digital tech, bigger seats -- what?
This sort of clueless shit just reinforces the obvious truth that the people who run movie theater chains don't actually see movies in movie theaters. Because I will tell you right now, right here, how to get people to go back to seeing movies in theaters. Without disruptive technology. Without theater upgrades. All for, oh, $4.65 an hour per screen.
I will now save your industry:
Hire. Fucking. USHERS.
The number one reason that every single person I know gives for not going to the movies anymore is the annoyance of dealing with people who just don't behave in the theater. Yes, yes, theater owners, your cell phone adds are cute. But how many of us have dealt with the idiots around us who dutifully turn off their cellphones, and then turn and chat -- not whisper, fucking coffee-klatch -- with the person beside them?
At Thank You for Smoking today, just as the credits on the movie started to run, a shaft of full sunlight light hit the room. A woman had stepped to the emergency exit, stepped just outside, and was propping it open so she could finish her cell phone conversation and sneak back in.
If you were at the Century 15 today at Santa Monica and heard a guy shout, full-on-bellow "SHUT THAT DAMN DOOR!", that was me. Fuck it. I'm not going to sit there and share rueful, annoyed looks with my friends rather than be uncivil. I've had to shut up people, people having full-on conversations, at literally every movie I've gone to in the last six months.
And why, why the hell is that my job? A couple times I've gone out to get a theater staff member because I didn't want to deal, nobody ever wandered in after I asked. Not complained. Not ranted. Politely asked. At the oh so spiffy Landmark Cinemas, might I add.
Again, I know this isn't just me. Literally everyone I know, when you discuss going to a movie, winces and says"Yeah, but what's the talking like at that theater?" Or even more fun -- last night, Lovely Wife and I watched as a couple took their baby stroller in to see Inside Man. What do you think ensued?
Sweet Jesus. I've heard the excuse -- "Hey, they can't afford a sitter", or "can't get a sitter," but as my Lovely Wife said "So, wait, they can't afford a sitter, so I have to use Netflix? How is that fair?"
Look, I worked in live, drunken shows all around the world for twelve years. Comedy rooms came and went, but the one rule was that despite the local economics, the club that folded wasn't the one with a high cover charge or high operating costs. It was always the one that didn't bounce the hecklers. People associate value of experience with the value you present to them (also why you always charge a minimum cover, never do a free show). And the value of my movie-going experience is not the snack selection, it's whether or not I can just sit and enjoy the movie I just spent more than ten bucks on.
Who are you going to lose? Those chatty cathy's? Hell no. 95% of the time they will, after being asked by even a faux authority figure, shut up. And even if you start to lose them, those people are like errant bombing runs -- each one, every time they ruin a movie, creates a dozen more home-theater insurgents. You're better off without them.
When we drive to a theater, we're not going to get more comfortable seats we can't get at home, we're not going because the snack bar has food we don't have at home ...
All we want to do is watch the movie. That's it. Hit that bar first, Einsteins. Worry about the Perrier service later.
105 comments:
You are so right. Every single movie and play and ballet we've attended in the last couple of years, we've had to ask people to stop talking or making their own "Mystery Science Theatre" commentary. Last live performance, it was a group of silver-haired folks who wanted to sing along with the performers.
Joh , you are now my movie-going GOD! Smite the noisemakers with righteous wrath. Include the people who have to get up and go to the snackbar or washroom or where ever every 15 minutes so they just wander in and out at random. And the people with the manners of a barnyard slob who insist on eating an entire trashbarrel sized "box" of popcorn chewing with their mouths open and talking with their mouths full while they consume enough food to keep a small African nation fed for a month. These are all the reasons why I WILL NOT go to a movie theatre if I can possibly avoid it. I specifically went to see one of the LOTR films at an 11 PM showing to avoid crowds and children. Some brainiac brought a two year old toddler. Like they are going to sleep through the Battle of Helm's Deep. At $25 CDN to go with my husband to see a film and experience true frustration and annoyance and NOT enjoy the experience, or wait a month or so, and spend the SAME $$$ to see the film at home whenever i want with whomever I want, which do you think I will do??
I rarely go to evening shows, because that's when the mouth breathers tend to go out. Weekday matinees are the best, and it's cheaper too. But I personally don't think unruly audiences are what's driving people away. They've always been there. The number one cause is it's getting too fucking expensive. Having the choice between spending 30 bucks so the whole family can go out see a movie, then pay for parking, food and maybe a sitter, or renting one copy for 4 dollars that you can watch on your 50 inch HDTV at home is a no brainer. With the release windows getting shorter it even takes the must see factor away. And don't forget competition from video games and the internet and sports as other viable entertainment options. I think the only way they're going to get more people going back to the theatres is to lower prices considerably, to like 5 bucks a ticket, and maybe even 2 dollar tuesdays or something. And be reasonable with the food prices. In the long run I think the movie theaters are doomed. Once the technology is there I think we'll eventually transition to some kind of fully immersive virtual reality as our primary form of entertainment. I'm sure movies will still be around in some form or another, but I truly think the glory days of film going as we know it will soon be behind us.
Best... rant... EVER (said in the Simpsons' Comic Book Guy voice)! Thoroughly enjoyed that post. Everything I've always wanted to say. My real problem is that I love going to the theaters to see a movie. Don't get me wrong... DVD is great, but it's no substitute for a movie theater. And that's why I will always subject myself to the torment of the annoying assclowns in the audience who will inevitably ruin my movie-watching experience.
Amen! Remember when the DMV or the bus stop was the place to rub shoulders with the dregs of humanity? Now it's ALWAYS the movie theatre. And everyone has their favorite "stupid person at the movies" story.
Mine was the teenage girl who answered her cell phone in Vanilla Sky and shouted, "Oh my GAWD - are you calling me from China?" That's around the last time I've been to the movie theatre...
Your solution, of course, is perfect. It wouldn't even have to be rolled out all at once. If a theatre announced that all shows starting after 9:00 would have a no kids under 17 with or without guardians and a strict no-talking policy, they'd see attendance for those shows double within weeks.
I stopped considering the local multiplex as a viable source of entertainment after going to see a 9:50 showing of Hollow Man. A family took up the seats next to us, planting their five year old daughter right beside me. She was quiet through the whole film, though. Somewhere, she'd learned to sob in terror without making a sound.
I don't buy the price argument that much, coltrane. Somewhat, but not enormously; it's no more a hardship for me to put together the thirty bucks for a movie-date today than it was to scrape up the ten or twelve I needed back in high school. Moreover, I reiterate John's argument about perceived value; things don't generally feel "too expensive" if you sense you're getting your money's worth out of the experience.
But as a man in his early forties who as a youth lived all over this great nation of ours, I can tell you beyond every shadow of a doubt that rude audiences did NOT always exist. Yeah, there have always been jamooks who don't know the difference between a whisper and a stage whisper, but before the advent of home video, people did not look at the movie theater as an extension of their FUCKING LIVING ROOM, and theaters didn't tolerate their rudeness like they do today. Back in college, the local indy theater had the greatest sign on their box-office window I've ever seen, one that I think of fondly and often to this day: "Crying Babies Will Be Boiled For Soup."
One of the most chilling things that John didn't touch on in his dead-on rant is that the problem is getting much worse at a much more rapid pace than theaterowners have allowed for, and here's why: who among us is leading the "Fuck if I'M gonna spend my afternoon in a movie theater with lamebrains" charge? That's right--THOSE OF US WHO KNOW *HOW TO BEHAVE* IN THE THEATER. The yahoo-to-civilized-folk ration is increasing quickly not only because carbonforms are getting stupider every year, but because those of us who know how to behave IN A SOCIETY have fled and left the multiplexes to the genetically challenged.
Our friend Corey brilliantly postulated that theaters may not even necessarily need a dedicated usher present at every screening. It might be enough--or, at the very least, would improve the situation--if every theater had two Call Buttons, one on each side of the room. Y'know, like the ones you swat at Target to let clerks know that someone in Aisle Seven needs help. These call buttons wouldn't need lights, they wouldn't need sound--they'd just be hooked up to a station in the office from which an usher could be dispatched. Just the IDEA that if you misbehave, your neighbors can go tap a button might be enough to create some positive social change. I dunno.
Man, I need a new TV.
I've often struggled to understand why certain people would want to talk on a cell phone in a movie theatre during a film. The only answer I consistently arrive at is that these people are wankers who cannot help themselves. Like kleptomaniacs just have to steal things, these people just HAVE to talk on a cell phone in a movie theatre. I can't speak for other people, but I'm certainly not interested in hearing about who has knocked up whom, or that Debbie-Sue is off to get braces next week.
Asking for your money back is certainly as good step; so is carrying a taser in your purse or man bag, although I’m guessing the cries of distress would be more annoying than their chatting, so scratch that idea ...
An Australian woman got into a crazy spot of bother in Texas not so long ago when she tried to shush another woman who was chatting on her cell phone, iirc. Apparently she tapped the phone user on its shoulder as she asked it to be quiet, and subsequently found herself the recipient of a filthy-mouthed tirade. Oh, and she was also charged with assault by the police.
Andy, I think you are on to something there. Good tactic. Where I am, it is not such a problem, yet. We always follow a few years behind you guys, but it will come. Going to file that idea away in the good idea basket.
cheers
Dave.
PS good rant John.
Step Two:
Reserved seating.
Ushers help part of the problem. The other factor is the R rating.
IIRC "R" ratings allow anyone under the age of 17 to see a film as long as there is an adult with them? Over here in the UK a "15" rated film and a "18" rated film means those are age limits. It gives the theatre an easy way to throw people out.
Of course the other problem is in Multiplexes once you've got your ticket for one movie and have got pass the ticket barrier.... You could in theory sit in on whatever film you liked as you aren't going to be checked. Often the awful kids who chat, phone, throw spitballs and worse, kick chairs, get up and run around the theatre haven't got a ticket for the film YOU are seeing.
As for ticket prices. Lowering them would be good. But why not a reward program - I've got a card which for £10.99 a month lets me got to see as many films as I like in the theatre for no extra cost. Now I manage about twice a month on average - because heck I've already paid. Theatre's expect to make more money on the drinks and sweets anyway so they win out as I'm more likely to go there.
That being said there's nothing worse than idiots in the theatre talking and making trouble.
There is a simple solution for the Cell phones however - Shield the building and make it a faraday cage.
dead on brilliant. In my NYC days, we would go to the theaters in Times Square just to hear the attitude at the theater, the talk back, the popcorn throwing, it was like a second show. But the only reason it was fun was because it was so odd, and we could retreat to normalcy all the way up in the '70's. NOW IT'S NORMAL. What are they doing at times square? Staying silent and being considerate just to be defy the establishment and rebel? Great post.
Screenwriter Bones:
http://www.screenwriterbones.blogspot.com
In Australia, you can't beat Dendy Cinemas. They don't show much Hollywood stuff (who's missing that anyway) but the audience actually *respects* the rite of going to the cinema.
People are quiet from the previews all the way to the end of the credits. It's the most enjoyable thing.
Been there, done that - I was an usher for several years of my life (in fact, you can measure it from the openings of Independence Day through to Eyes Wide Shut with a six month break at University inbetween) and man, I don't see anyone at the multiplex I go to now doing the work I used to.
I've stopped smokers, bounced out underage kids, thrown out drunks, stopped drug usage and on one occasion pursued a "deranged man" into the gantrys above our main screen. (although he later turned out to be a fantasy of one of deranged co-workers, long story.)
Nowadays I see nothing of that going on, when it quite plainly needs to. I've had to hear full-on mobile conversations during "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory" and "War Of The Worlds" during the last year alone, and it's getting to the point where I can't stop myself.
Actually, a while ago I didn't. I was having a really bad day when I went to join my friends at a preview of "Anchorman", and this group of five guys behind us were talking non-stop before the movie. Then the lights dimmed. And they started making loud unfunny comments about the BBFC certificate. And then the Dreamworks logo. And then Judd Apatow's name ("Sounds like German, HEIL!"). And then about a helicopter...
At which point I turned around and shouted, louder than the movie "WOULD YOU JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!"
Sure they told me to fuck off back, but then they did actually shut the fuck up and stop talking. Ironically enough, I think they and my friends were then the people to laugh loudest at the movie for the rest of it, but that's fine.
I'm glad I did that, and I'll do it again. But I sometimes wonder why I want to make movies if a-holes are just going to talk over them.
having a sniper hiding in the rafters with an infra-red scope in every cinema screen to deter video pirates with camcorders AND people who talk would be a sensible suggestion.
Amen.
I've given up going to our local cinema on a Friday night, because I just know that i or one of my friends will end up in a confrontation with some mouth-breather over what constitutes acceptable behaviour in a movie theatre. Even during the week, though, I can feel myself tensing up when I sit down, just waiting to find out what particularly asanine thing someone is going to do to ruin my movie this time.
Bravo!
Luckily there is a second run theater in the neighborhood that is reasonably quiet. Had a nasty experience there recently, though. A man showed his kid how to cut in line. I thought the guy might have made a mistake, but he told me that he was teaching his kid "how to take advantage of opportunities." The manager showed up at this point, I told him what had happened, and he just ignored the situation. I haven't been back. Probably will go eventually.
I think the point that people do not like being forced into confrontations with their fellow theatergoers is an important one. If owners saw their job as making sure that well-behaved ticket buyers had a pleasant experience, more people would go to the theater.
Perhaps a return to the days of blade duelling (pistol duelling might encourage patrons to mischievously discharge their weapons inside the theater, and then you have an additional noise problem).
Won't shut up? Step outside, asshole, and let's see if you manage that epee as well as you run your mouth.
Sure, there'd be the occasional Comte de Rochefort who was loud, obnoxious and a puissant swordsman, but at least that person would miss a significant portion of the film (say, if the challenge were issued just prior to the big "reveal") and would themselves be inconvenienced as they were inconveniencing the other theater-goers.
And, they might just miss the whole thing with a punctured lung, depending on how good your parry-quarte riposte-six is.
Regardless, excellent rant, and some great follow-up posts here.
Rob (I'll sign username as Desert Son from here on out, seeing as how someone else posts here as username Rob, to avoid confusion, not the least of which might be my own)
This is why I go to Arclight cinemas in Hollywood if I can. I choose the seat I want. Ushers take me to that seat. They introduce the movie and make sure that people turn off their cell phones.
And -- there are certain screening times in certain theaters where there are no people allowed under 21 as they serve alcohol.
Sid Gannis, please, no more Oscar rants until you tell theater owners to provide a service.
preach brother - we all have these horror stories - I would have really loved the 40 year old virgin if not for the screaming two year old in the front row who kicked and yelled through the entire R rated picture.
I'm linking ya . . .
Preach on, brother!
everyone has their favorite "stupid person at the movies" story.
here's mine: i tell a guy to shut up during a screening of crouching tiger hidden dragon. guy looks at me and says, 'what the fuck do you care? everyone's talking chinese. you can't understand them anyway.'
Think airplanes. But with a real screen and highend Bose headphones.
Interactivity.
Sound in full 5.1 bluetoothed in, volume controls, and a mic with interconnectivity controls to talk to anyone in your group.
You want to purr delicious coos into your girl's ear all night? You want to Ebert the whole thing with your office pals? You can, and never bother anyone around you.
Until then, do as I do.
Matinee.
However, the biggest reason for the decline in attendance at the chains ... most studio movies SUCK these days!
testify rogers. fucking testify.
Worst experience I've had in a theatre recently was Narnia, just before Christmas.
We routinely go to the post 10PM shows to avoid small children, but the adult children as becoming just as bad. We'll probably go see movies, but I think I'm going to start demanding to get my money back if there has been excessive disruption. The next day of course, as there's never a manager around that late.
My worst experience at the cinema was a screening of Mulholland Drive at the West India Quay UGC in London.
Some French tourists were talking loudly throughout the film, one of them evidently translating the movie for the rest of the them. It only took me a minute or so to snap. I remember barking "Unless you're recording a commentary for the DVD I would really shut the fuck up, RIGHT NOW!" Which did the trick...
Of course this weekend I had V for Vendetta partially marred by an annoyingly talkative couple in the row behind me. I just stopped watching the movie and glared at them till they closed their yapping cakeholes.
Mercifully my local Art House cinema has the best behaved audiences on the planet. Alas, they tend not to show movies which lose little on DVD. So if I really want to see a blockbuster without the presence of noisy hooligans then matinee screenings are the only way to go.
Still, bad as the movie going experience can be in the UK it's frankly nightmarish in the US. Yep, not only does that R rating mean that genuinely adult fare can never get a wide release it also ensures that there'll be screaming children at screenings of everything.
Amen.
If you can't afford or trust a babysitter, you don't go. There is a reason for nearly two years my wife and I barely saw film at the theater.
Hire. Fucking. USHERS.
Fahreals, yo.*
When I went to see The Matador** a couple weeks ago, a guy in the audience got up halfway through the movie and nonchalantly took a piss in the trashcan rather than wander out to the bathroom and miss three minutes of dialogue. I'm trying to watch the movie, and I can hear dude's urine spattering into a plastic bag twenty feet away. I thought about walking over and confrontiong him, but then I had an image of him turning and pissing on me that just didn't look like a good time.
* I'm sorry.
** A really good movie, btw -- Pierce Brosnan's best role ever.
Watching a movie at home is more convienent, cheaper, more comfortable, hassle-free, and completely avoids the whole rude people ruining the experience problem.
The only value theaters have is a bigger screen and earliers shows (as in, you can see the movie before it gets to DVD). The former is rapidly being offset by big/wide-screen tv's anyway. As for the latter, the general quality of most movies is so low (other than the eye candy) and/or the movie is just a new skin on top of a plot that's been done 5 billion times already that it's just not that big a deal to wait.
They should be ejected, photographed, and have WANTED POSTERS ("dead or alive") of them hung in the theater lobbies and behind the ticket booth.
Let them try to blab in a faux beard, 70's wig, and dark sunglasses.
see, although I dig the home movie experience, there are some flicks that should not just be experienced on a bog screen, but in a group.
There's no laughter like group laughter, and damn, when a horror movie really works, it really works with a crowd.
And that moment in Cache ... I haven;t heard an audience make that sound in a long, long time.
I've been on both sides of this fence, having been both an usher/movie theatre ass't manager and a former avid movie-goer.
Back in the late 80s/early 90s I worked at a one-screen theatre in a town of about 45,000 people. I'm a people-pleaser, an eager beaver who goes the extra mile to make things right. But, I'll tell ya, it was pretty tough -- and rather dangerous -- being an usher back then. I've have to deal with men having sex with each other in the washroom, a delusional schizophrenic who thought that the actors onscreen were sending them subliminal message to kill the people sitting in front of them, screaming babies -- and parents who decide to change their diaper right there on the seat, teenagers hurling wads of gum at other movie-goers hoping it would get stuck in their hair, a raving drunk who wandered in without paying, telling me he'd been hired to kill someone in the audience -- and then proceeded to stab me in the arm for interfering with his 'mission'...it was a nightmare, and at $4.75/hr., it didn't pay nearly enough to put up with that crap.
Nowadays, as a movie-goer who sees only two to three film per year because of the cost and constant irritations from people around me, I can definitely see the advantages of waiting for the DVD release so you can watch it at home on your 60 inch plasma screen in hi-fi stereo surround -- and as soon as I can scrounge up $7,000 I'll be doing just that.
Bill is absolutely right about Arclight. I was in LA for the summer and saw several movies there. No jabbering idiots, no pre-movie commercials, reserved seating, etc. The tickets cost a little more than what I'm used to, but I really don't have a problem with paying more, so long as I get a higher quality product or experience. I'm even willing to put up with a bit more crap at the $1 theater. But what I won't put up with is paying more to get less.
Years ago I decided to check out the movie version of Evita. It was my misfortune to have a gaggle of adolescent girls in the row immediately behind me. They chattered and giggled incessantly from the moment they arrived. I was wondering why they were even there until Antonio Banderas made his first appearance on the screen and the girls shrieked and made swooning noises. Later, however, I could pick up a grumbling undercurrent in their chatter. It burst out into the open when Banderas made his second appearance and immediately launched into song: "Ogawd, he's singing again!" one of them wailed. At last I understood. I turned around in my seat, smiled wickedly at them, and said, "What do you expect, this movie is a musical -- all the way through." They glared back at me and they all got up. For a moment I thought we were going to be spared their presence for the rest of the movie, but they ended up sitting down again across the theater, where they were much quieter. Apparently a couple of the diehard Banderas fans prevailed on the group to remain for further appearances of their dreamboat, even at the cost of sitting through a movie they hadn't realized was a musical.
You know I was thinking about this and I think shaming (not that many people seem to have shame these days) is the way to go about it.
First up you have to give fair warning. Before every single film you run a clip of someone - I'm thinking someone the people either like as a comedian or "get". My choice Dennis Leary for the R movies and NC-17. No idea for the PG etc. They come on screen and give a talk - how it's a pain in the butt with the talkers, the callers, smokers and the rest.
Now then the screen goes BRIGHT white - and it's voice over time. "Now you can see the other people in here with you. You know what they look like so if they break the movie rules - you know who they are."
This should scare a few folks and also empower the rest of the audience to be able to point out trouble makers to of course... the Ushers "Swat Team".
What I can never understand is how people "learn" the bad behavour in the theatre. But then behavour in a theatre is one of those "un written laws". So educate and then punish.
This, needless to say, is absolutely 100% true. I think the reason it hasn't already happened (and possibly won't, anytime soon) is that theatre owners, in the infinite wisdom that's seen their business go down the tubes, believe that what they're providing is a "social experience": that this is what sets a night at the cinema apart from renting Bubble on the same evening.
And while we're talking about the kind of marketing grand-masters who can somehow make $4 for an undersized ice cream seem sensible, these are people who can't get their heads around the notion that we go to see movies in a community setting surrounded by our fellow human beings, but that this doesn't mean we want to hear our fellow human beings' running commentary.
The "show and shame" spots suggested above won't fly because, well, put yourself in the shoes of an exhibitor for a second, besieged by increasingly comfortable and prompt home releases of the pictures that used to be your exlusive province. Starting a show by telling people they now have to conform to a code of behaviour in order to watch a movie? Why, that'll send them home in droves! Tapping folk on the shoulder, during a movie, and telling them their opinions on the poor exposition-to-explosion ratio of Syriana aren't welcome? We might as well just buy them a dvd player!
Which, of course, is moronic-argument bullshit, but you have to think how this must look to exhibitors. The majority of audiences contain talkers, therefore
making it clear to audiences that talking will not be welcomed in this establishment is going to dissuade customers. Never mind that longer-term, it'll get your theatre a good reputation among grateful repeat-customers such as those cited above: with the Cinema Industry In A Tailspin (tm), immediately putting strictures upon what people can and can't do in your theatre must seem like a deathwish.
I am not a cinema owner and love going to movies and I hate having to sit near talkers. I want a solution to this problem as much as y'all do...
I have just had a terrible thought.
What if all of those large companies that produce home theatre systems start sending people with cell phones, obnoxious voices and horrible laughs into movie theatres just to piss us off, so we'll have to go out and buy their stereo and TV equipment?
God Rogers! What have you started?!!
truetruetruetruetruetruetruetruetruetrue
Now I only go to kids movies with my 8-year-old niece.
Two rather obvious points to --
THEATRE OWNERS OF AMERICA
_____LISTEN__UP!_______
1. See how many comments are above and below?
Do two things --
a. Read them all until you have them memorized.
b. Locate a falculty member of a university English, Rhetoric, or Computer Science Dept that can do a quantitative and/or qualitative text analysis of these comments. Memorize that.
2. Here's one you might have overlooked: EXPERIMENT with possible solutions.
Commenters -- my own two cents. The offenders seem to treat theatre space as they would their own living space. There they do as they please.
And perhaps theatre owners suffer from myopicbottomlineitis, and can't see the connection.
truetruetruetruetruetruetruetruetruetrue
That is the absolute truth. Heck, was talking about this with my co-worker just a couple days ago. How people don't want to go to theatres, because they can have the silence and enjoy their movie AT HOME, for a vastly cheaper price.
If we're going to pay the higher price, there should be something else to it. I already get high-quality sound and video here, so what can the theatre offer me?
I remember going to "The Exorcism of Emily Rose", premiere night. The crowd was a mess. Mostly teenagers (14, 15), and all of them rowdy. A fight almost broke out while waiting in line, between -- I don't know how to describe it except to say -- two "gangs" of teenagers.
My friend literally took a step out of line, between them, and they both back off.
We waited, and finally they opened the doors to the theatre. That was when all hell broke loose.
Beats the fuck outta me why, but every one of those sheep (teenagers) tried to get through the doors first. People were pushing and shoving, all around acting like.. like it was a burning building and those doors were the only exit.
Finally, my friend reached his boiling point with it all. He turned around, pushed one of the kids, and started yelling, "BACK THE FUCK OFF! BACK OFF!"
Everybody stopped moving. Then in a more organized fashion, filed into the theatre. My friend tapped the 'Usher' on the chest as he walked by and told him, "You need to get better control of this place".
I haven't gone to the theatre since. I was an am disgusted by the actions of the patrons, and even further disgusted by the owners/management who look the other way.
You all sound like a bunch of Andy Rooneys.
"Why, In my day..."
Sorry, Daddios (and Mommios). We have been eclipsed by the more vulgar, more course segments or our "culture" and I doubt there's any going back.
While I agree it's a big fat pain in the ass to listen to some moron trying and failing to guess the next plot twist in the Spongebob movie, this is the future.
DVDs encourage the behavior that makes moviegoing sometimes so awful. People get comfy blahblahblahing through even the most intense moments.
Theatres like the ARCLIGHT have had some success pricing out the riffraff but, really, the days of a minimum wage worker risking their neck to shut down the conversation of someone who may or may not be armed/psychotic/drunk/whatever (at least in Los Angeles) are pretty much done. I used tto have that job.
They didn't pay me enough. And I'm a big guy.
coda: cell phones encourage all manner of evil behavior. They are so obviously the work of Satan I wonder that anyone owns one.
Damn right .. the only thing better than ushers would be BETTER MOVIES!
I don't know where all you guys are seeing your movies, but I don't recall this ever being a problem for me. Obviously I'm in the minority here, but the main reason I haven't been past the box office much in the past year is that there haven't been that many movies I wanted to see.
Mind you, I have heard other people making the same complaint. My theory is they're all Hollywood guys trying to shift blame.
My wife's solution is easy: apparently the Arclight is really quiet. She thinks it's because everyone has been stunned into silence by the $14 ticket price.
Funny as the various assholes-at-the-cinema anecdotes are, I've got to say I'm most sympathetic to Kane and Redjack on this one. (And as both Redjack and Kelly note, the theatre that's going to be able to pay ushers what it's really worth to enforce a "quiet theatre" standard is looking at some serious overhead indeed.)
To tell you the truth, I don't notice talking in movie theatres that much unless it rises to the level of the hyper-obnoxious, which is rare. There's something to be said for having decent staff and enforcing cell phone rules (cell phone conversation is hyper-obnoxious almost by definition), but the factors that keep me and most people I know away from movie theatres are
1. Price, and not just of tickets; criminally overpriced concessions are invariably part of the experience, and never in a good way. Sorry, but price really is a big, big factor, particularly for those of us not making big bucks.
2. The nature of the product. I'm really not down on the quality of film as a whole these days -- indeed I can't think of many years in the Nineties that were such embarrassments of riches that a film like Crash seemed an only mediocre member of the pack. However, the whole price consideration means that, apparently like a lot of other people, I tend to confine my cinema-going to the really epic occasions -- and that kind of movie has tended to really, really suck in recent years (with a few honourable exceptions, like Syriana).
3. Film industry-related obnoxiousness. There's a bit of a vicious circle here: falling attendance forces the adoption of measures that further deter attendance. Ergo, we now have to sit through twenty minutes of advertising to see a film; not trailers, mind you, but just some dumb-assed Coke ad or the latest Subaru winding through a closed course. Moreover, there's a good chance one of those ads will be lecturing us -- the patrons who paid money to sit in a movie theatre -- about how terrible it is to pirate movies. If we're at any kind of special screening, there's even an excellent chance that we were frisked for film equipment on each entry to the theatre.
All of these are becoming real deal-breakers from me. As an overall problem, talkers are a distant fourth.
Terrific, thought-inspiring post there, KF Monkey. Here are some other thoughts to consider:
1. Have we become more sensitive to this as a problem BECAUSE we are now so used to watching the movies in the quiet comfort of our comfy chairs and bigger screens at home these last 20 years or so? People chewed with their mouths open and shouted back at the screen in rage at Mr. T for shoving Mick to death in Rocky Trois...but what was once considered a distracting annoyance now an assault given that we now have a competing alternative option at home?
2. Does the product on the screen tend to drive the excessive audience behavior? Our experience in the DC area might be somewhat different, albeit not a suburban mega-plex experience, but rather a Landmark theater-type experience. Look at the top box office draws most weekends this year. They tend to be the same grind house fare from the '70s...the slasher/horror, the blacksploitation, the chop-socky movies now upgraded with bigger studio splash in this decade. Those pictures unabashedly attract a younger, raucus, talk back to the screen crowd...just like their predecessors in the old days. That's part of the experience, no? The same isn't really true of the experience of watching movies at places like Landmark, at least not in our experience in the DC area, with movies that attract sizeable, but older crowds. Older people chew their corn loudly too, and they talk a bit, and forget to silence their phones...but tend to settle down a few minutes into the picture. It's a better experience, usually. But then again...the movie is usually more rewarding too than the typical studio fare these days.
3. True confessions...isn't it a gas, once in awhile, to go with a bunch of friends and laugh your asses off and crack wise back at the screen? Like at the Austin Powers movies? Or Something About Mary? Isn't that part of going out to the movies, too? Time and a place for anything? I know what you're saying though...it happens too much and too often inappropriately.
All the teenagers I know are always corteous and polite at theatres. On the other hand, I don't know many teens. There's nothing worse than getting into a R-rated movie to find some 13-year-old bimbo and her friends cowering in horror once the damn thing starts.
Terrific post, as usual. But you're wrong. For the great majority of moviegoers, the price is the biggest single excuse given for not going to the movies more often.
At least with my friends, it is.
Straight out of left field...
This is just a symptom of a more general problem. For at least the last forty years Americans have rejected formalized courtesy, under the enlightened postmodern assumption that a reading of the Golden Rule and common sense is better than a bunch of arbitrary rules. It's coming back to bite us in the form of egoists who view courtesy as only one of many possible strategies for getting their own way, and perhaps an inefficient one at that.
I've become something of an Aristotelian about this as I get older. In particular, people do not learn to be generally polite and then deduce courtesies from that. Instead, people learn to be polite by being continually taught, nay, forced, to obey specific rules. Through following those rules they become polite people inductively over time.
We could certainly stand to stop before reaching Victorian levels of structure, but it's high time manners made a comeback, and I'm willing to give up coming into work "whenever" wearing a t-shirt if that's the price that must be paid. We don't just need ushers. We need what ushers represent, but across society.
Sorry, Rogers. Here's your soapbox back.
Is it just Americans who are having problems like this? I live in Halifax, Nova Scotia, and I go to the movies pretty often, but I generally have a good experience with it. There's been an odd problem with talkers here and there, but it's generally pretty rare.
Dude, you've hit the big time. PZ Myers is linking to you. :)
Well, it would also help if a)the neighborhood theater wasn't dead and b)more of the US had functional public transit.
Three of the four theaters in my city (~150,000, counting surrounded small towns) are located within a couple of miles of each other on the far west side. The other is located on the far east side. We have no night/Sunday bus service.
Weekends usually involve one early matinee - but if you can't drive, Saturday is spent running all the errands that can't get done during the week, and Sunday requires a cab.
Top that off with lousy studio product, aggravating audiences and badly-maintained theaters (I'm looking at you, Kerasotes) ... and you have a package that costs much more than its value.
I highly sympathize with all this. I used to go to the movies weekly, but with the rising costs and the shorter window for DVDs, that has changed. Let me drop a little inside knowledge.
Three years ago, I did the internship for my senior year of college at a local theatre chain in Cleveland. They have a mix of smaller art-house and mainstream 'plexes, and it is owned/run by the guy who started the Cleveland International Film Festival. He has integrity, but he's got to make money and compete with the big boys (Regal, Cinemark) just for movies, let alone revenue. We used to have to be careful to play by "x" studios' rules when running one picture to make sure we were going to get another, like a summer blockbuster.
You are never going to get rid of two things that people currently hate about going to the movies (besides crappy flicks), and those are the high cost of concessions and the rise of in-theatre advertising.
Margins are stretched thin as it is. Studios take up to 90% of box office on opening weekends, especially for high-profile pictures. How does the theatre-owner make any money? Concessions, concessions, concessions. This is the "old" stream of revenue. I can't remember the exact figure, but a majority of a theatre's profits are made from concessions. Think about pop. When any establishment gets that canister, the syrup/mix costs pennies a glass. That's why restaurants can charge you $1.50 or whatever for a glass and give you endless refills, and they still make money. So think about what a theatre clears when they charge you $3.50 for a small soda with no refills. And popcorn is one of nature's cheapest foods. Hell, the imitation butter probably costs more.
In-theatre advertising is basically found money. A few geniuses found a great way to squeeze more cash out of downtime. Whether it is slides or annoying commercials before trailers, the theatres have a faucet of money running that won't be turned off. Even if less people are going to movies, those ads still run.
The theatre business is inherently stupid. They turn down the damn projection bulbs in the misguided notion that they think it's going to lengthen the life. What makes you think these other things are going to change?
BTW, Landmark couldn't make it with an arthouse in Cleveland.
I agree that it is the noise. Yes the prices are high these days, but I could take it if PEOPLE WOULD JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!
Its not just the movies either. I was at a rock concert where these two ditzy girls were having a conversation that just got louder and louder. It was like they were annoyed that there was music in their way.
Bob T: Talkers at rock shows annoy you? That's curious - seems to me rock shows are usually loud enough that talkers aren't a factor. I could see if it was a jazz show or a small folk combo or something...
Juancho: I see what you're saying. I'm actually curious about the difference between the profit models of arthouses and more mainstream theatres, because in the former the exorbitant concessions prices and general obnoxiousness seem to be less of a factor. (Thus, I tend to go to them more often. Advertising slides pre-show, sure, that's not a big deal -- but I'm less likely at an arthouse to have to endure, say, a harangue about piracy prior to the show.) OTOH, I'm not familiar with any theaters in my neck of the woods in which arthouse ownership is combined with ownership of other types of theaters -- but maybe that's a commonplace and I'm just not aware of it.
To jfkmonkey (get a more original name on THIS site!)
I think thereis a HUGE difference between interacting with the movie, like yelling back at the screen and cheering for the hero, and just holding your own LOUD rambling conversation about non-movie related topics that disturb the viewing pleasure of those around you. Yes, audience participation can greatly enhance a film. Discussing your date from the night before detracts from the film. If you are in the theatre to watch the movie THAN WATCH THE DAMN MOVIE! Take your other conversations elsewhere.
I teach at a college for a living, and I'm strict about talking and disturbing the class. No student has the right to interfere with the learning experience of another student just because the offender wants to discuss the hockey game with his buddy or play games on his laptop during my lecture. If your hockey game or your computer game is more important than getting the education you paid for, take it elsewhere. That's how I feel about movies and theatres. If you are not interested in what you PAID to see, take it elsewhere so you don't waste the time and money of the people around you.
As for cellphones - they are banned in my lectures. If a cellphone rings during my lecture, the entire class stops dead and the offending student is forced to stand up and sing a song in front of the entire class. Rarely do I have more than one phone ring per term, once they realize i am serious. Public intimidation and humiliation is a strong deterrent. And no other instructor or admin person has ever complained.
Thanks, John. I'm bookmarking this to send copies to theater management every time I run into this crap in the future.
After all, this is California, where I can't get a concealed-carry permit. In civilized places like Florida, Nevada, or Utah, you can employ the means and once suggested on their movie review show on a Chicago radio station: turn to the loudmouthed twit, and warn them if they don't STFU, mommy or daddy or girlfriend or whoever they're with is going to get it in he head.
Of course, Buzz and Tony rate movies based on the number of quality kills in them...
When I was a student, it was the money. Not just for movies, but for everything. Now that I have a real job it is *absolutely* the quality of the experience. Which is why I don't mind a bit paying $14 for a ticket at the Arclight. I know I'll get a reserved seat, with a good picture on a big screen and decent sound, a real usher, and an audience that behaves. Plus, they have great carmel corn. It's totally worth the additional $4 bucks.
My only objection is that the dang Arclight is across town and a bit of a haul. Otherwise I'd never go to another theatre.
So - you said it KFM! And the Arclight isn't exactly hurting for business.
-PS
Tru, dat, about the profitability of the concessions. They're generally not quite as profitable as the admissions, but not that far off.
On average the studios get about 45% of the actual box office. Total revenues per screen for the big chains is about $300K per year.
Surprising as it may seem given what's happened to ticket prices, practically the whole industry went bankrupt around the turn of the century. Too many screens.
Oh, and here's a tip: if you want it quiet, try going mid-week. Couple of years ago I saw School of Rock at a Hollywood theater on a week night. Counting my wife and me, there were I think four people in the place.
See previous post re theaters going bankrupt.
Wow, tons of comments. Clearly the topic hits a nerve. Contrary to a few who say the obnoxious factor has been around forever, most people really see it as a problem of behavior and lack of consideration. My last theater experience was after two stupid teenagers who apparently had seen the movie before and had to explain it to each other. When told to shut up, one replied, "I am explaining it to him." Damn bozos. You keep telling it like it is. Actually hiring ushers is not enough. I would hire the biggest, meanest bouncers money could buy so any inconsiderate bozo could be booted out swiftly.
However, it is clear the theater owners will not do this. Heck, they probably should read this blog post to get a clue. Actually, I have seen similar rants on other places, so it is clear people are simply pissed and simply figuring out they can watch a DVD in peace at home. As far as I am concerned, commercial movie theaters can go the way of the dodo and the passenger pigeon.
BTW, I got here via Pharyngula's blog. Best, and keep on blogging.
This blog needs to go everywhere. I wonder if "Rocky Horror Picture Show" is to blame for bad manners in theatres these days?
AMEN.
Best,
-R
Its paying $10.75 and having some idiot talk all the way through it.
I try to hit the first show opening day and even that doesn't work.
I haven't been to a movie on Friday or Saturday night in years because its the film going equivalent of Rollerball.
You know, coming from the screenwriter of "The Core" aka Earthboom, and "Catwoman" I can't help but find the irony in your commentary.
I know that personally, when I start talking in the theatre, it's because the movie really really BAD (like Catwoman and The Core) and since I paid my money I'm gonna entertain myself somehow.
Sing it! Fucking ushers, indeed. I have lost count of the number of movies ruined by inane conversation and running commentary (all times of the day, all days of the week, all age groups).
After I flat-out refused to go to a theater for 18 months, my husband convinced me to try a Sunday matinee of "Lost in Translation" at which there were two groups of teenagers in the back row and a fortysomething couple in front of us. The woman left during the opening credits and returned five minutes into the movie with dumptruck load of popcorn and some massive sodas. She proceeded to ask, at full volume, "WHO'S THAT? WHERE ARE THEY? WHAT DID I MISS? WHAT HAPPENED? WHY ARE PEOPLE SPEAKING JAPANESE?"
When my husband asked the lot of theatergoers (the teenagers were also chatting away), "Could everyone please be quiet, or I'd like ten dollars?" the man in front of us replied, "This is freedom of speech, and if you don't like it [insert threat to physical well-being here]."
Suffice it to say, I would rather pay for a Netflix membership than kung-fu lessons, so unless there's a burly-usher-renaissance, my moviegoing days are probably over. I wish movie theaters would take notice and listen to what you (and all these others) have to say, because I think their profits would go way up and our collective blood pressure would go down.
I decided that movie-going had jumped the shark when some genius brought his toddler to see Kill Bill Vol. 1. I could hear the little sprog asking his dad questions during the movie; I can scarcely imagine what sort of answers the dad could have possibly given.
I used to really enjoy going to the theater, but people are getting more obnoxious by the day and it's just not worth the aggravation anymore. Besides, I have a big screen with surround sound and a comfy chair. Plus I can pause it to go get a snack or take a bathroom break. All of that comfort, quiet, and convenience for less than the price of two movie tickets plus snacks! I would consider making a trip back to the theater if they would hire bouncers and clean the damn floor and seats once in a while for heavens sake. The place looks like a pig pen most of the time.
Not a new phenomenon. The difference is the type of disruption. 10-15 years ago, at 1/4 of the movies I went to, people kicked my seat. They don't just kick, they kick and push against the seat continuously like they're 2 years old. Still happens. I used to move, but then you have to deal with other people who take off their shoes and put their stinky feet on the seat next to you or people talking or whatever.
It's gotten to the point where I'm paranoid about anyone sitting behind me and cannot relax. Trust me, being tense and paranoid for 2 hours during a movie is not fun. I usually sit at the side in a row where no one is behind me, but it's not always possible. I've actually smacked someone's leg hard who was non stop acting like a tied down frog on speed. They stopped for 5 minutes and then continued. Unfortunately this was a fully packed preview, so no point complaining.
It doesn't seem to matter what time of day or week you go, there is always a disruptive influence.
Now I complain and get a refund, every time there is a full conversation, every time someone kicks my seat, every time they have sound or film problems - I have to get out of my seat to find someone to get the projectionist to fix it with rarely even a thank you?, give me back my money. If they say you can't get a refund after 1/2 hour into the movie, point out the people who were having a full conversation came in more than 1/2 hour into the movie. They'll sook, but you'll get a refund.
Re: To the academics
I know classical music and plays were performed to a crowd of people chatting and being loud. I know it was basically background noise to them. That's fine, that was then. Classical music was also performed by a bunch of drunks and louts. Do you advocate all directors and actors must get drunk to make good films? I want to watch a movie and enjoy it, get over it.
Re: Old people
Can be worse than teenagers.
Re: People coming in late
Don't have a 5 minute discussion about where you are sitting in a nearly empty theatre. You sit in the same area every time, your girlfriend always wants to sit in the back or whatever. Sit your arse down and shut up. Don't then continue to ask for 5 minutes whether the seats are okay, and then get up and buy snacks.
And if you are late and there is hardly anyone in the theatre, don't sit right behind me and kick my seat. One day I'm going to snap, and you will have a reason to charge me for assault, once you come out of your coma.
Re: Food
Open your chip packets during the ad break, will it kill you to get 1 minute of oxidation on your chips? If you bring in a full cooked meal, don't put them in the noisest bags you could find.
Re: Sick people
Geez, if you are coughing and sniffling non stop, stay the hell home you toerag.
Re: Chinese cinemas
Funny thing is, I hate it when people gasbag during foreign films, except at Chinese cinemas. I don't mind it when people have full on phone conversations, it's just a different atmosphere. Better acoustics as well, so people talking isn't so loud.
Re:Arthouse crowd
Sometimes they're better, but other times not.
The crowds at these movies can be worse. They draw the same crowd of people who go to the theatre and have full conversations. There was a play I went to, I had 4 people right in front of me have a 4 way conversation during Shakespeare. No smartarse scholar jump in and point out Shakespeare wrote for the smelly people, I don't frickin' care. I could only hear every 3rd line. The usher heard them and did nothing. By the way, the Theatre is not a cinema, stop eating cookies during the Opera you cretins.
I absolutely loathe film festivals now. Besides you lining up to buy tickets and their computers are broken (put a sign up so we don't waste our time), and their online ticket software doesn't let you buy passes, you have to deal with just as rude a crowd, except you expect them to be better behaved.
Re:Ticket prices...
People complain about the price of anything. There are people who spend $200 each Friday night on alcohol, who then complain about a $10 movie ticket.
The worst part about tickets is having to line up with people buying candy. What's that, you've lined up for 1/2 an hour and still haven't decided whether you want snacks or not? Do you SMS yourself to remember to breathe? Or those theatres with bizarre lines where no one can figure out where the line for tickets actually are.
Re: Quality movies
It's rare I want to see a movie on the screen anymore. I used to go weekly, but with all the disruptive influences I wait for DVD. Even then I wait for it to go weekly. There are just too many good classic and old foreign movies available to watch.
Now if I want a good night out, I go to Bollywood films. The crowds are small and well behaved, and I get a 3 hour entertaining movie for my money.
Re: kids in the cinema
They showed the original King Kong (30's version) recently in Oz. There were at least 10 kids running around. I'll refresh your memory, it was violent, in one scene Kong rips a creatures jaw apart. Needless to say the kids were screaming in terror and crying. Nice parenting skills.
I was watching a horror movie, where there were sound problems, the volume dropped to almost zero. On top of that, a woman had brought her baby along, and proceeded to play with a laughing bag. They have special sessions for mothers and babies, take your brats to those you selfish cow.
I'm always going to go to the theater because I've loved the entire experience since I was a kid.
I see about 40 movies a year at the theater and I witness unruly moviegoers about twice a year.
However, I live in the midwest (in a city of around 250,000). For the most part, people are pretty respectful. The last time someone got on my nerves was during "A History of Violence." An older man answered his cell phone and talked for about a minute. That's about the worst thing that's happened to me in the past year.
I, too, avoid seeing movies when I think the theater will be crowded. I wait until the movie has been out for a week (or three), and try to go for times and locations less likely to attract teenagers or idiot parents with small children.
However, I was with Anonymous when we went to see EarthBoom. Let me tell you, the commentary from my fellow movie-goers (including Anonymous) vastly enhanced what would have otherwise been a rather unpleasant movie-going experience.
I know this is an old thread, but I just had to vent. Maybe, people will keep adding their stories here, and we can get the theaters to knuckle under.
I watched "Tokyo Drift" tonight in a sparsely-filled theater (big second-week dropoff, yikes). A group of about 7 13-year-old boys were talking loudly during the trailers, so I walked up to the back row, where they were sitting, and politely asked them to keep it down. The little pipsqueaks assured me that they would hush after the movie started, so I said that was cool, just please try to keep it down.
They did pretty well until the second half of the movie, when they started throwing M&M's (or something of similar size), snickering and making loud comments. I'd already talked to them once, so I summoned the security guard, but the precious little devils had all split up by the time we got back.
The security guard stuck around, though, which was nice.
But, I wish they'd, in John's words, "Hire. Fucking. USHERS."
I said that to the security guard, in polite terms, and he completely agreed with me. His stepdaughter was once hit in the head with an empty water bottle while they were watching a movie together (at the same theater, which is in an upscale Orange County neighborhood).
I haven't been to the theatres for the last 2 years now, and i am not planning on changing that. I prefer to watch the movies at home, in the privacy of my livingroom - or together with friends who actually have manners.
Food and drinks are better and cheaper, and i can hit pause and play whenever i feel like having a biobreak or not.
you are wrong in this...
americans don't go to the movies because they are fat and lazy...
they just give excuses
You hit the nail on the head. Dead center.
I've been to two movies, in a theater, in the last five years. And frankly, if I see never go to theater again, no big deal. Sure, I'll miss the big screen. Sure, a nice, high powered surround system is fun but the one constant is the shitty crowd.
One of my marketing sells home theaters. Business has never been better. $5k, $20k, tons of them over $50k. Sure, many American can't afford that. But make no mistake, even the folks who blow a grand ona little mini-theater system think they've got something great.
Why?
Because the only time their movie experience is when they hit the pause button. They watch the movie in their underwear and the popcorn and soda isn't half their car payment.
Add to the utter cluelessness of the corps. running theaters and well, thanks for the business.
Could theaters have some "silent" viewings and some "regular" viewings? Or would the obnoxious folks just go to the silent viewings because they have no idea that it's THEM you're complaining about?
When you say "ushers" I picture pimply teenagers in bad uniforms. What movies need is bouncers, muscular men (or women) with tattoos and prison records. Folks who can silence rowdy youths by throwing a couple against the wall and making them stick there, who will not only confiscate a cell phone but crush it like an empty beer can. If Movie Bouncer Boot Camp opens right after Labor Day, the first class can pass out in time for the Christmas releases.
Meanwhile, two words: film festival. Those audiences behave as if they were in church, and the theatre doesn't smell like a hamster cage. Well worth the trip to Toronto or Sundance.
I have worked for various theater companies and completely agree with you. I didn't have time to read all the comments and I'm not sure if anyone offered this solution but... The management at my last theater spoke of a device that can shield a building or individual rooms from certain or all radio frequencies. Shield the theater rendering all cell phones obsolete and presto! Who would not attend a theater where it was public knowledge that cell phones were useless? I would buy a ticket every Saturday night, not to watch a movie, but to watch asshole-moviegoers as they attempt to use their phones. One question that arose with this technology was the liability factor. You know, if someone needs to be contacted because of an emergency, will the theater be liable? Well, how did that scenario pan out pre-cell phones? And, if the facility posts a notice/waiver of liability on the front doors or even on screen before the feature, wouldn't that cover all the bases? I could see a pre-show policy that informs the audience that all cell phones are dead getting a standing ovation. And yes, hire. fucking. ushers. (ones that have balls and aren't intimidated by the public) after a good 6 months to a year, the local area will understand the theater's policies, and it won't take much effort to keep the place quiet and peaceful.
O.K. I know this is an old post, but I thought I'd share this with you. It's a novel solution to the problem of no ushers and it works like this: When you are getting your ticket to go into the theater, randomly(it seems), the ticket person asks you if you want a call button, if you say yes they give you a little fob with a button on it. The cool thing is, if someone is bahaving rudely you hit the button and shortly a theater worker comes in and fixes the problem. I don't know exactly how it works or how they know where in the theater to go, but it does. I've never seen it outside of California though.
I'm sorry I don't agree with you. There are a couple reasons I don't go to the movies any more ... The first and foremost is that the damn things are just too expensive. They started being too expensive when they reached $2.50 per ticket and now there at 4x that amount. The second major reason I don't like to go is that the people who run the place are deaf --- TURN THE VOLUME DOWN YOU DUMB SHITS!
And the last and probably the most important reason why I don't go any more; are the movies themselves ... Who makes this crap? I mean how in the hell dose anyone with more that two active brain cells invest in one of these epic pieces of junk. Some classics like: "Dumb and Dumber", "40 Year Old Virgin", "Ave Ventura and ??? - well anything with this jerk in it." And whats out there today? Lets see, Oh yes the epic: "Harold and Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay" Now there's a real classic in the making, for you. For myself, I'm sure I would be just as happy if they had been stood against a wall in front of a firing squad.
These guys shouldn't be making movies at all, they should be locked up someplace with padded walls. People like this are not only an embarrassment to themselves; their an embarrassment to the entire human race. And what hurts the most, is the fact that they probably got paid a shit lot of money to make the stupid thing; And on top of that they will now get paid for the rest of there lives, their kids , and grand kids lives for their stupidness.
I would like to know when did MORONNICLY STUPID took the place of funny?
I know that there are a lot of you out there that don't agree with me. After all Harold and Kumar' probably made millions last week, and will probably make millions more -- I guess it's all quite understandable from a public that is willing to pay $6.00 for a cup of coffee that should cost quarter, or $8.00 for a hot dog (at any sporting event) that should cost half a buck, or $40,000 for a car that should cost $4,000 --- the list goes on and on.
Some, in fact most of us, arent millionaires!
手形割引
ペアリング
インプラント
美容整形
債務整理
ショッピング枠 現金化
ショッピング枠 現金化
外為
FX
出会い系
格安国内航空券
不動産 東京
ブライダル
ブライダル
中高年 転職
資格
オーガニック
為替
ダイビング
チューリッヒ
東京 一戸建て
格安航空券
韓国ツアー
海外推广
国际推广
网络营销
网络推广
システムキッチン
外国為替
人材派遣
競馬
包茎手術
手形割引
ペアリング
インプラント
美容整形
債務整理
ショッピング枠 現金化
ショッピング枠 現金化
外為
FX
出会い系
格安国内航空券
不動産 東京
ブライダル
ブライダル
中高年 転職
資格
オーガニック
為替
ダイビング
チューリッヒ
東京 一戸建て
格安航空券
韓国ツアー
海外推广
国际推广
网络营销
网络推广
システムキッチン
外国為替
人材派遣
競馬
包茎手術
デリヘル
横浜デリヘル
横浜デリヘル
品川デリヘル
すすきの 風俗
包茎手術
デリヘル
人妻 風俗
精力剤
勃起薬
熟女
勃起 不全
デリバリーヘルス
男性下着
吉原 ソープ
威龍
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吉原 ソープ今までの吉原にはまったくない、新しい吉原 ソープのお店です。お客様に提供するのは、究極の癒しとリラクゼーション吉原 ソープです。今まで吉原 ソープに縁の無かったお客様のニーズにお応えします。吉原 ソープ今までの吉原にはまったくない、新しい吉原 ソープのお店です。お客様に提供するのは、究極の癒しとリラクゼーション吉原 ソープです。今まで吉原 ソープに縁の無かったお客様のニーズにお応えします。吉原 ソープ今までの吉原にはまったくない、新しい吉原 ソープのお店です。お客様に提供するのは、究極の癒しとリラクゼーション吉原 ソープです。今まで吉原 ソープに縁の無かったお客様のニーズにお応えします。吉原 ソープ今までの吉原にはまったくない、新しい吉原 ソープのお店です。お客様に提供するのは、究極の癒しとリラクゼーション吉原 ソープです。今まで吉原 ソープに縁の無かったお客様のニーズにお応えします。
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Penyakit ini umumnya muncul karena penderita mengejan terlalu keras pada saat buang air besar. Dengan mengejan terlalu keras, maka pembuluh darah di sekitar anus dapat melebar dan pecah menimbulkan infeksi dan pembengkakan yang berakhir pada masalah wasir atau ambeien tersebut.
Penderita Penyakit kondiloma atau Kutil Kelamin yang telah terinveksi disarankan untuk segera melakukan pengobatan secepat mungkin sebelum Virus HPV penyebab kutil kelamin makin banyak berkembang biak di dalam sel darah makin lama dibiarkan akan memperparah kondisi organ vital karena kutil kelamin akan terus membesar sehingga terlihat seperti jengger ayam untuk penderita yang baru tertular kurang dari satu bulan biasanya akan lebih cepat ditanggulangi obat kutil kelamin Paling ampuh dari De Nature dan terbaik ada hanya di http://obatkutildikemaluan.blogdetik.com/ untuk mendapatkan informasi yang lebih jelas mengenai pengobatan kutil pada kelamin silahkan kontak langsung di nomer 0852 808 77 999 atau 0859 7373 5656 Bagaimana mengobati Ambeien itu sendiri. pengobatan yang terbaik untuk Ambeien adalah dari luar dan dalam sehingga Ambeien benar benar tuntas dan tidak akan kambuh lagi. obat Ambeien terbaik "Ambeclear dari De Nature" AlamiAdalah obat Ambeien herbal yang memang terbaik untuk mengobati Ambeien, dan sudah terdaftar di badan obat dan makanan (BPOM) dengan nomer registrasi POM TR: 133 374 041. terbuat dari bahan alami antara lain terdiri Daung Ungu, Mahkota Dewa dan Kunyit Putih.
wasir ambeien bisa sembuh tanpa harus di operasi maupun injeksi cukup dengan obat wasir ambeien herbal ambeclear herbal de nature dari daun ungu serta mahkotadewa aman untuk ibu hamil
Berhati-hatilah anda yang suka berganti-ganti pasangan seks, karena sangat besar sekali kemungkinannya untuk terkena penyakit kencing nanah atau gonore maupun yang lainnya.
Bukan hanya pengobatan medis saja tapi ada juga pengobatan rumah alami yang dapat digunakan untuk menyingkirkan penyakit kutil kelamin ini. Intinya, karena kutil ini muncul di daerah yang sensitif, maka anda harus mencari pengobatan yang terbaik pada kulit Anda dan jika diperlukan juga dibantu dengan tenaga medis yang professional. Sebab dokter akan menjadi sumber informasi yang baik untuk mengobati penyakit ini.
Cara yang sering di lakukan untuk menghilangkan kutil kelamin adalah dengan cara pembedahah atau operasi, cara ini tentu memerlukan dana yang tidak sedikit. metode Pilihan pembedahan yang dapat Anda lakukan
Kadang disertai
dengan sakit saat kencing, perih, organ intim terasa panas menyiksa,
gatal,..
Sekitar Vagina Tumbuh Daging, Berbahayakah? Kutil Pada Kepala Penis mirip bunga kol atau jengger ayam, Merupakan Penyakit Yang diakibatkan Oleh Virus.Kutil kelamin, atau disebut juga condyloma acuminata, adalah kutil atau daging berwarna kulit atau keabuan yang tumbuh di sekitar alat kelamin dan
Sebelum kita membahas tentang pengobatan ambeien, dalam kesempatan ini
saya ingin menjelaskan sekilas tentang ambeien, agar kita semua bisa
memahami benar apa itu penyakit ambeien
Obat kencing nanah doxycycline
Obat kencing nanah di samarinda
Nama obat kencing nanah di apotik
Nama obat kencing nanah di apotek
Obat kencing nanah kimia farma
Obat farmasi kencing nanah
Obat kencing nanah gonore
Obat kencing nanah generik
Obat kencing nanah go
Obat gonorrhea kencing nanah
Obat gejala kencing nanah
Nama obat kencing nanah yang di jual di apotik
Tempat jual obat kencing nanah
Apotik jual obat kencing nanah
Apotik yg jual obat kencing nanah
Jual obat kencing nanah di jakarta
Jual obat kencing nanah di surabaya
Jual obat kencing nanah bandung
Obat kencing nanah kaskus
Obat kencing keluar nanah
Obat kencing keluar nanah di apotik
Obat kutil kelamin tradisional
Obat kutil kelamin
Obat kutil kelamin wanita
Obat kutil kelamin di apotik
Obat kutil kelamin denature
Obat kutil kelamin resep dokter
Obat kutil kelamin malaysia
Obat kutil kelamin apotik
Obat kutil kelamin di anus
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Wasir atau dikenal juga dengan ambeien merupakan salah satu jenis penyakit
yang sangat mengganggu. Ambeien atau wasir ini muncul..
yang sangat mengganggu. Ambeien atau wasir ini muncul..
yang sangat mengganggu. Ambeien atau wasir ini muncul..
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