Tuesday, December 20, 2005

DaRw1n hAs PWNED U !

A breathtakingly thorough judicial smackdown of the Intelligent Design foolishness in Dover, PA. All about it here.

11 comments:

Geoff Thorne said...

"The breathtaking inanity of the Board’s decision is evident when considered against the factual backdrop which has now been fully revealed through this trial. "

Man. That's so tasty I want to lick the bowl.

Anonymous said...

I really want to send that judge a thank you card!

Anonymous said...

Some knucklehead newspaper has printed the presiding judge's picture, wonder how long before the "good Christians" have him bumped off. Activist judges are just judges who disagree with the Lord I guess.

Anonymous said...

You know, I've been trying to find out for quite a while... what does PWN stand for?

Unknown said...

Dale To Astonish said...

You know, I've been trying to find out for quite a while... what does PWN stand for?


It's 1337 speak ("leet" short for "elite"). It means "own" as in "I own your ass beotch!"

Anonymous said...

You dudes seem excellent. So here are some questions I have for you, my peeps:

In Villains United, who was that totally awesome looking guy with the two giant dogs in the splash page when the Society showed up to kick the Six’s asses? Catman totally pwned him two pages later, but who was he? My friend Jix Casey says he is called Captain Puppy Dog Ears, but I suspect he is kidding me. I think it would be awesome if he were called Pound-Master! But I don’t know. Please tell me. Do it now.

Also, I love Countdown to Infinite Crisis. I get wood every time I reread Maxwell Lord blowing that stupid Blue Beetle’s head off. I’m talkin teak here. But there aren’t any credits? Who wrote it? I heard Alan Moore wrote it. I think this would totally rule! Someone tell me it’s true. Do it now. Also, who drew it? It looks like George Perez to me. Some tell me.

Also, someone told me Kyle Rayner is gay. I heard there was a comic where he was making out with Azrael in the Bat Cave. I hope this isn’t true because it would make me ralf. Also my friend Jix Casey says that after Infinite Crisis is over DC is going to do a comic where Azrael and Kyle Rayner get married in Kandor where gay marriage is totally legal. I don’t think comic books should be doing this kind of story. These are for kids. Even the ones with torture. So I hope this isn’t true.

Lastly, who is the greatest super character ever done? I think it has to be Monsieur Mallah. He is so cool. I think he should have his own book. Only they should call him something better, like Ape of Wrath or Gorilla Soldier or something cool like that. Because the idea of a French gorilla is really stupid.

Please answer all these questions or I could die. For rizzle, my pizzle.

Unknown said...

You dudes seem excellent. So here are some questions I have for you, my peeps:

In Villains United, who was that totally awesome looking guy with the two giant dogs in the splash page when the Society showed up to kick the Six’s asses? Catman totally pwned him two pages later, but who was he? My friend Jix Casey says he is called Captain Puppy Dog Ears, but I suspect he is kidding me. I think it would be awesome if he were called Pound-Master! But I don’t know. Please tell me. Do it now.


He is DogMaster, so called because he knows the lost ancient Chinese art of fighting Doggie Style. Wait, that sounds wrong ...

Also, I love Countdown to Infinite Crisis. I get wood every time I reread Maxwell Lord blowing that stupid Blue Beetle’s head off. I’m talkin teak here. But there aren’t any credits? Who wrote it? I heard Alan Moore wrote it. I think this would totally rule! Someone tell me it’s true. Do it now. Also, who drew it? It looks like George Perez to me. Some tell me.

Weirdly, Perez wrote it and Alan Moore drew it. It's part of his whole finding religion thing.

Also, someone told me Kyle Rayner is gay.

Bi-curious. According to Geoff Johns.

I heard there was a comic where he was making out with Azrael in the Bat Cave. I hope this isn’t true because it would make me ralf. Also my friend Jix Casey says that after Infinite Crisis is over DC is going to do a comic where Azrael and Kyle Rayner get married in Kandor where gay marriage is totally legal. I don’t think comic books should be doing this kind of story. These are for kids. Even the ones with torture. So I hope this isn’t true.

It is true, but they actually just move to Canada. Which is cool, as Azrael goes on to work the net for the Leafs, where his weird-ass padded outfit finally makes sense.

Lastly, who is the greatest super character ever done? I think it has to be Monsieur Mallah. He is so cool. I think he should have his own book. Only they should call him something better, like Ape of Wrath or Gorilla Soldier or something cool like that. Because the idea of a French gorilla is really stupid.

Monsieur Mallah's real name is unknown -- people just call him Monsieur Mallah because the French thing pisses him off and, hey -- angry monkey=funny.

The greatest monkey character name is from the amazing game Feng Sui, where the cybernetic gorilla leader of the resistance in the year 2250 is named ... Battlechimp Potemkin.

I nearly crap myself with glee every time I think of it.

Hope that satisfied you.

Doc Nebula said...

I was actually kind of curious to know who Captain Puppy Dog Ears/Dogmaster was myself. Did they just make the guy up to be Catman's arch enemy? If so, Catman should get a refund.

I've always been morally certain that Jim Starlin actually wrote COUNTDOWN, just because Starlin gives great death.

Anonymous said...

Hey, Justin, one quibble:

it is not the LAW of evolution because it has not been SCIENTIFICALLY advanced to that state.

Not true. Theories don't "advance" to laws, and "law" is not a higher state of science than "theory".

A scientific law is: "1. A natural phenomenon that has been proven to occur invariably whenever certain conditions are met. 2. A formal statement describing such a phenomenon and the conditions under which it occurs."

A scientific theory is: "An explanation of why and how a specific natural phenomenon occurs. A lot of hypotheses are based on theories. In turn, theories may be redefined as new hypotheses are tested."

Laws decribe that something happens, and the math behind it. Theories describe WHY something happens. The two are not versions of each other - the Law of Gravity says that masses attract each other with a measurable force proportionate to their masses and the square of the distance between them. The Theory Of Gravity says that this happens because space-time curves around masses, causing them to "roll" towards one another.

The theory of evolution is never going to be "advanced" to a law. That's not how science works. It is, however, the single strongest, most tested, most supported, most predictive theory in science. A hundred and fifty years of evidence along many independent lines all confirms that the theory of evolution is the best answer anyone has as to *why* living creatures adapt, and any replacement theory would have to match all the same evidence and support all the same predictions (even if the reasons were different). Evolution is the hardest theory in science to do this to, because it's the most supported one.

If creationsists win out and it is taught as science do I get to explain exothermic reactions as "it happens because it was intelligently designed that way!"?

Yes. Yes you do. That's the scary part.

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