Monday, February 16, 2009

How NOT to Pitch at a Convention

by M A N

I love working at conventions. Don't get me wrong, it's a lot of hard work that's both physically and mentally draining, but it's also genuinely fun. I sincerely enjoy getting the chance to talk with people about books (yes, mine especially) and socialize with colleagues.

What isn't quite as much fun is having to deal with a creator who has no concept of professionalism or courtesy. Fortunately, 98% of the creators that come up to the booth don't fall into this category. Most know how to present themselves. It's just that 2% leave me scratching my head in disbelief.

First off, I'm not an editor. I have zero control over what the company publsishes and who they hire (they hire me and, to be frank, that's really all I care about). Yet, surprisingly, after explaining this and then directing the creator to the person they SHOULD speak with and how best to contact her, a few still continue to pitch me the idea. I can certainly apprecaite the enthusiasm and the desire to share that excitement, but I think it's best to reserve those energies for the times when it can actually benefit the creator.

Another thing I find surprising can be summed up in the following, slightly fabricated, exchange:

Creator approaches booth, stack of samples under his arm.

CREATOR: HEY, WHO ARE YOU GUYS?

ME: WE ARE THE MOST AWESOME AND AMAZING PUBLISHING COMPANY EVER TO GRACE THE FACE OF THIS PLANET, BOOM! STUDIOS.*

A choir of angels descend from the heavens, accompanied by a chorus of golden trumpets.

CREATOR: COOL. I'VE GOT AN IDEA THAT'S PERFECT FOR YOU.

Okay, for one thing, "who we are" is plain to see just about everywhere at the booth, from the massive logos on the tablecloths to the backdrops to every book we have displayed on the tables. Granted, most conventions are textbook examples of stimulation overload so I can understand how one could miss it. If you're a customer. But if you're a creator, my sense of empathy diminishes. You should really know who you're submitting to. Even if you've never heard of the company before, at least take five minutes to peruse their booth to see what it is they publish, what styles of art they prefer. If you notice a heavy selection of faerie romance titles on the tables, perhaps your splatter-punk serial killer story might not be the best fit.

I'm not saying you should write a dissertation on the company's history before submitting to them, but you should do a minimal amount of homework. Even if it's just a quick walkthrough there at the convention.

There have been plenty of people who come up to the booth cold, but they usually ask a few relevant questions then spend several minutes looking over the books. THEN they ask about submission policies, hiring practices, etc. This is how it should be done. But if you walk up, ask me who we are, and then proceed to tell me you have something that's perfect for us, I'm going to know you're full of shit. If you don't know who we are, how could you possibly know what idea would be perfect for us? I can appreciate the confidence, but the lack of homework screams "unprofessional."

I have no problem talking with people at the booth. In fact, I love it. When I'm working at a convention, I'm there to promote myself, my books, and the other titles we publish (not necessarily in that order). Talking with customers is a big part of that, whether they buy anything or not. I'm proud of the books I write and the books BOOM! publishes and I want people to know that. So when a creator's pitch interferes with that agenda, it becomes a problem. A big fucking problem.

Recently while at a convention, a creator approached the booth with his project in hand. After I explained our submissions policy, he began to pitch me anyway by pulling dozens of sketches and scripts from a large manilla envelop and spreading them over the table, covering the books we were trying to sell.** As if that wasn't bad enough, his father then pulled out a large fold-out map of the convention floor to determine their next destination and layed it over another large section of our table.

Folks, do not do this. Ever. Especially unsolicited. When you show that kind of disregard and disrespect for a company's products, why in the world would they ever want to do business with you? That's a good way to make sure you never get published (although I must give him kudos for having a father who supported his creativity enough to play navigator).

There are, undoubtedly, numerous places on the intertubes that discuss the finer points of convention etiquette (and this goes for folks behind the booth as well as in front of). I would assume most of those points are common sense, but if you're a creator and aren't sure if some of your tactics may actually be backfiring, search them out.


*Yes, I really do say things like this.

**Honestly, there was a moment I seriously, seriously, thought he was going to break into interpretive dance.

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