Thursday, January 11, 2007

Shorter Bush

You know, some people are rattled by this:

Pressed on why he thought this strategy would succeed where previous efforts had failed, Mr. Bush shot back: “Because it has to.”

They search for the best way to describe a President who engages in military policy opposed by his Joint Chiefs and contradicted by his own brand-new counterinsurgency policy, who doesn't seem to understand the difference between goals and strategy, recycles last year's "Plan for Victory" with more troops, and is apparently hell-bent on starting a war with Iran ... a man incapable of calculating risk versus reward, or even understanding that hope is not a plan ...

The geeks have it cold. The rest of you just won't get it, but --



George Bush is Leeroy Jenkins, baby.

I so want the t-shirt with a picture of Bush and Leeroy's name under it. That video summarizes in two minutes what's it felt like watching Bush for the last six years.

Bonus serious links:

Juan Cole comments

US Troops hit an Iranian Consulate in Kurdish territory

Troops for the surge will come from Afghanistan

Now the number of attacks on troops is "classified"

There seem to be issues with equipment for the new guys, too.

(UPDATE: wow, heavy linkage. Here's the latest Index Page for you new folk. Welcome to the geekery)

45 comments:

Anonymous said...

GEEEEEEEEEORGGGGGE BUUUUUUUUSSSSSSSSH!

You will rue the day you compared a true hero like Leroy Jenkins to the likes of George Bush!

But seriously it makes one wonder what the new definition of insanity: "A President who does the same thing each and every day expecting a different outcome."

Do you think dubs believes those "The more you spend the more you save" adverts?

Anonymous said...

I think I love you.

W is completely Leeroy Jenkins. Aggroing the mobs and pulling them onto the rest of the PUG and then going, "At least I ain't chicken."

Hell yeah, I'm a geek.

Anonymous said...

Freaking perfect!
Also, from here:
GENERAL: Ex... ex... ex... actly! And that is what is so brilliant about it! It will catch the watchful Hun totally off guard. Doing precisely what we've done eighteen times before is exactly the last thing they'll expect us to do this time!

There is, however, one small problem.

CAPTAIN BLACKADDER: That everyone always gets slaughtered in the first ten seconds?

GENERAL: That's right. And Field Marshal Hague is worried that this may be depressing the men a tad. So, he's looking to find a way to cheer them up.

CAPTAIN BLACKADDER: Well, his resignation and suicide would seem the obvious.

The underlying tragedy or course being all the dead and maimed...

Anonymous said...

I blame that fucking Apollo 13 movie. Saying "Failure is not an option" does not, in fact, cause that to be so.

Anonymous said...

For the beneifit of the non geek, courtesy of his Wikipedia entry:

'This Internet phenomenon started with the release of a video clip online to the World of Warcraft forums. The video was released by the World of Warcraft Alliance player guild PALS FOR LIFE on the Laughing Skull PvP realm.

The video clip is a machinima recording of the game World of Warcraft. The clip begins with ten players, including Leeroy, planning a raid on part of a dungeon. The players are heard discussing tactics before they enter, however, Leeroy remains quiet. In real life, Leeroy was away from his keyboard and was not paying attention to the discussion. Just as the team begins discussing the final plan for its assault, Leeroy suddenly springs to life, shouting his battle cry of "Alright chums, let's do this! LEEEROY JENNNNNKINS!". Leeroy then charges fearlessly into battle, to the complete and utter incredulity of his teammates. Attempting to save him, they are quickly overwhelmed by the monsters after abandoning the plan entirely.'

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leeroy_Jenkins

Wonderful analogy. The only way to get this man to listen is to unceremoniously dump him and his administration straight into the middle of the Red Zone.

Anonymous said...

That sound you hear is Canadian troops in Afghanistan and their families back home taking one for the Dubyan Persistence Front.

Anonymous said...

Condi on Capitol Hill t'day: "It's bad policy to speculate on what you'll do if a plan fails when you're trying to make a plan work."

That must be one bigass bong they're bringing to NSC meetings.

Anonymous said...

But -- even Trump rags on his dumbass apprentices about always, always having a Plan B. Why doesn't Condi believe in Plan B? Why doesn't Bush believe in Plan B? Do they have it mixed up with the morning-after pill Plan B?

Dweeze said...

Leeroy Jenkins is cute, but it was staged. I'm surprised the wiki link doesn't include that.

The full wiki article does include a long discussion about the staging.

Anonymous said...

I've never played WoW before, but that is fucking hysterical. Well done.

Wil Wheaton said...

Heh. I wrote a "Shorter George Bush" in my vox blog, and got all excited when I saw this post, because I thought it meant you read my blog.

I am so lame.

More on point:

Bush: What's our chance of success?

CIA: 32.33 percent; the 3 is repeating of course.

Bush (sighs): Well, that's better than my approval ratings, at least.

Nita said...

Wil Wheaton led me here, and oh...how funny. That was friggin' Hawesome!

Anonymous said...

This page has been submitted to Digg. Prepare to be overwhelmed.

Anonymous said...

Came here through Wil Wheaton. Your comparison inspired me to do some Gimping.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/geekrev/355462431/

Anonymous said...

Tom's comment gave me pause. I went back and listened to the last two seconds again. I would not have actually HOWLED with laughter were Tom correct that Leroy said, "At least I ain't chicken."

I am convinced, as I was on first listen, that what Leeroy said after all that senseless and avoidable carnage was, in fact, "At least I have chicken."

As a nongamer, I have NO BLOODY IDEA what is going on, visually, in that clip. But John's metaphor comes through brilliantly. And at least George has chicken.

Anonymous said...

"Why doesn't Bush believe in Plan B?"

mary - They all believe in a plan B. They believe so much, in fact, that they don't need a Plan A.

That's right - every single strategy is "Plan Bush"! Leeerooooy W Jeeenkiiiins!!

Anonymous said...

The most depressingly apt analogy I've seen for our "leadership" in a long while.

I'd love to see that video dubbed with Dubya's voice.

Anonymous said...

Nailed it.

Anonymous said...

Brian: Eh, whatever.

Anonymous said...

"hope is not a plan"

Of course, that was never the real plan. The real plan is this:

(1) Do something random to try to look heroic.
(2) Fail.
(3) Blame the failure on victory-hating l33burulz.

The goal, as always, is not to avoid (2), but to achieve (3) at all costs.

Anonymous said...

Man you made me smile. Here's a t-shirt design I hope makes you smile.

Based on your comparison of course.

Leroy Bush

Anonymous said...

Oh my God.

It all makes sense now.

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